~Volant~
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 Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 7:33 pm Post subject: Gray (V) |
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Gray
Scene V
(It’s early morning. Blaine is sitting against the back wall, deep in thought. Sage has fallen asleep in the same position as last scene. Prate is up now, making twine, and Mute hasn’t moved since last scene at all. Mute wakes up.)
MUTE: Sage? Sage, you ‘wake? (beat) Sage?
BLAINE: Why are you always the first one up?
MUTE: (slightly caught off guard) Well, if you’re up, then I ain’t the first one, am I?
BLAINE: But before I came…
MUTE: Nah, Sage’s usually up ‘fore me. It’s just these last few days, is all.
BLAINE: Huh. (beat) Sage told me his past.
MUTE: Did he?
BLAINE: Yeah. He was the tutor to the prince, I hear.
MUTE: Yup, that’s him.
BLAINE: He told me all the other tutors were hanged.
MUTE: Yeah, I know that. Everyone ‘round the palace know that. I even caught a glimpse o’ the last one.
BLAINE: Really?
MUTE: Well…not ‘live. I was runnin’ to get somethin’ for Cook, and I caught the last few seconds of him. Y’know, that last part.
BLAINE: You saw him hang?
MUTE: Yeah. Real creepy. I always thought the term “stretchin’ necks” was just a term, but come to think of it, his neck was slightly…taller. I remember one o’ the others in the palace tellin’ me that the coffin that cooper made and delivered was too tall for him, but when I saw them throw ‘im in, he fit just fine. It made a fine story to tell all the girls in the kitchen. Cook heard the last two sentences and wouldn’t let me tell the story again.
BLAINE: Oh…(beat) Sage mentioned that you worked in the palace.
MUTE: (nervously) He did? What’d he tell you?
BLAINE: Everything except whatever you’re convicted for.
MUTE: (relieved) He didn’t tell you?
BLAINE: He refused.
MUTE: Good.
BLAINE: Why are you here?
MUTE: (beat) ‘Cause…’cause obviously, I…unpleased the king…
BLAINE: How’d you…“unplease” the king? Did you break a law?
MUTE: Well…it ain’t really a law…he was just…unpleased, is all.
BLAINE: Then what did you do?
MUTE: I…I…I don’t want to talk about it.
BLAINE: (leans back leisurely, looks up at window) Pretty sunrise.
MUTE: Really?
BLAINE: I can’t really see it, but I can see the sky’s color. You’re right, it’s not always blue.
MUTE: What color s’it?
BLAINE: How did you land yourself in here?
MUTE: That’s…that’s not fair.
BLAINE: I’m the only one who doesn’t know. But that’s okay. I’m also the only one who has a window.
MUTE: Please…
BLAINE: I’ll tell you what the sky looks like. But I’ll need your word that you’ll tell me why you’re here.
MUTE: I…I don’t know…
BLAINE: They’re really pretty colors…
MUTE: (anguished) Alright, alright! I’ll tell you!
BLAINE: Do you promise?
MUTE: I promise! I promise!
BLAINE: Good. (studies the sky beyond the window) It’s a purplish pinkish color, flecked with blue here and there. The clouds are wispy, spread thin. They’re bright orange. (beat) I’m not as good at describing as Sage, but…
MUTE: It’s fine. (leans against the bars and sighs)
BLAINE: Well? Are you going to tell me or what?
MUTE: That was a low blow, y’know. Just give me a chance to see it. I need that, at least.
BLAINE: You won’t break your word?
MUTE: (offended) Why would I do that?
BLAINE: Good.
(Blaine is trying to be patient while Mute is trying to imagine the sky. Sage wakes slowly, then realizes Mute and Blaine have been awake and jerks up.)
SAGE: You didn’t tell him anything?
BLAINE: Shh…
SAGE: What did you tell him?
BLAINE: Nothing, except what the sky looks like.
SAGE: Can I trust you on that?
BLAINE: I gave you my word, didn’t I?
SAGE: We are in a prison.
BLAINE: (to Mute) You ready?
MUTE: Just…just one more minute, please…
SAGE: You sure didn’t tell him?
BLAINE: Believe me, if I had told him, he would look a lot worse than that.
MUTE: Alright. Fine. Okay.
BLAINE: You ready?
MUTE: Yeah. Kinda. Sorta.
SAGE: What did you do to him?
BLAINE: Nothing. He’s telling me the story you wouldn’t tell me.
SAGE: I told you he’d tell it when he was ready!
BLAINE: He’s ready.
SAGE: “Kinda. Sorta.” What did you do?
BLAINE: You sure you’re ready, Mute?
MUTE: …Yeah…yeah, I’m ready…(deep breath) well…see…I was runnin’ to fetch Cook somethin’, right? And…well…(sigh) Do I have to?
SAGE: No. No one’s going to force you to do anything.
BLAINE: You gave me your word.
SAGE: Blaine…
MUTE: Nah, I’ll do it. I did promised. (takes another breath, tries to steady himself) One of the other boys that worked in the kitchen were missin’, and Cook wanted me to find him. So I ran, not wantin’ to let Cook down, and…and I must’ve took a wrong turn or somethin’, ‘cause…(pause) Well, normally…When the princess…she had all the corridors blocked and guarded…
BLAINE: The princess? As in, the king’s daughter?
MUTE: So…you see where this’ll go?
BLAINE: I think…but keep going. I’m probably wrong.
SAGE: Blaine…
BLAINE: Oh, let him finish.
MUTE: Well…one of the guards kinda slacked, I guess, ‘cause I came right through without no trouble at all. Not even a word. I noticed nobody were ‘round, and I thought it ain’t normal, but I was hurryin’ too much to care. Then I saw that I wasn’t goin’ in the right direction, that the blue crystal vase wasn’t on the right turn, that the silver mirror with the red rubies and green emeralds wasn’t over the mahogany table, that the table, even, weren’t there. And there weren’t no one to ask what was goin’ on. So I just sorta…wandered, y’know? I figured that, if I wander around for a while, I’ll eventually come to somethin’ I know. It wasn’t very smart. I should’ve just turned right ‘round and tried to go back. Goin’ forward was just stupid.
Then…then I heard…(puts his head in his hands)
SAGE: It’s okay, Mute. You don’t have to go any further.
BLAINE: You gave me your word.
SAGE: Blaine—
BLAINE: (calmly) Shut the hell up.
MUTE: I…I heard…well, I heard a kind of noise comin’ from a room a bit ahead, and…and I was curious. The door was wide open…I should’ve known what was happenin’, I should’ve turned and run…
BLAINE: What did you see?
MUTE: I…I…I really don’t…
SAGE: Mute, it’s fine. You don’t have to—
BLAINE: What did you see?
(long pause. Mute flushes bright red and puts his head in his hands.)
MUTE: (mumbles into his fingers) She was takin’ a bath.
(Blaine starts to laugh.)
MUTE: Are you laughin’ at me?
BLAINE: (still laughing) No, no, Of course not!
MUTE: You are laughin’ at me! You are! Quit it! S’not funny!
BLAINE: Oh, it’s funny.
SAGE: Blaine!
BLAINE: It is!
SAGE: Well at least have the decency to quiet down!
BLAINE: I’m sorry, I’m sorry…(tries to bring himself under control) back to your story.
SAGE: After that outburst, it would be completely justifiable to break his word.
BLAINE: I’m sorry. It won’t happen again. I’m sorry. Don’t stop, Mute.
MUTE: (miserable, still red) There ain’t much more to be said. I was kinda frozen for a while, but, y’know, girls scream. And they scream loud. I tried to run, but there were still those guards ‘round the bound’ries, and they caught me. I ain’t very fast, see. The king…well, you can imagine, he was pretty angry. I don’t really blame him, y’know? I mean…well, I’d be pretty angry, too.
(pause) The guards all dragged me down here, and I stayed down here for a while—I can’t count the days—wonderin’ what they were gonna do to me. It’s real horrible, knowin’ that whatever’s comin’, it ain’t gonna be good, but not bein’ able to brace yourself for it. Preparin’ for havin’ a hand chopped off is different than having a head chopped off.
When they finally came down, though…I knew. I knew exactly what was gonna happen. Was in their eyes, y’know? And it was the next logical thing they would do, besides hangin’. And if I was gonna hang, they would’ve led me out of prison, and not deeper into it.
It’s crazy to see how the mind clings to things it might never experience again. There ain’t much color down here, but I saw it all. The yellow gleam of sunlight, the green moss on the walls, the orange rust on the bars…(quieter) the coppery gold of a fire, the bluish tinge of metal…things really stick out to you.
The last color I saw was a bright red. It’s a good thing, I guess. The yellow, the green, the orange…they’s almost gone. But that shade of red ain’t never gonna fade, y’know? Not in a million years. That color will be with me forever. Ain’t my favorite; a bit bright for me. Hurts my eyes to look at it. But it’s color, ain’t it? I shouldn’t be favorin’ any one color, cause they’re all the same when you can’t see ‘em, y’know? Just words. I mean…how can you describe blue to a blind person?
(No one talks for a while. Mute is deep in thought, fiddling with his rock, while Sage is glaring down at Blaine.)
SAGE: That wasn’t by his own free will. (no answer) How did you get him to tell you?
BLAINE: I don’t know what you’re talking about. He was perfectly willing.
SAGE: You know exactly what I’m talking about.
BLAINE: I swear I didn’t do anything. I promise.
SAGE: We are in a prison.
BLAINE: Stop saying that. You keep telling me that you don’t trust me.
SAGE: And with good reason. If I find out you did anything to make Mute tell you—
BLAINE: I know.
SAGE: —I’ll strangle you.
BLAINE: I said I know! |
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Dear Lord, I have been asked, nay, forced to ask a blessing on this turkey. A turkey that was very much alive with real emotions, that nuzzled it's young with almost human like compassion...anyway, it's dead now, and we're about to eat it. Amen. |
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Jiggity
The Sinister Jigster
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| Posted: Mon Dec 01, 2008 9:06 am Post subject: |
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| It’s crazy to see how the mind clings to things it might never experience again |
That wouldn't come out a twelve year old's mouth today, let alone in the olden days.
I was hoping it wouldn't be so predictable, the eyesight thing. Turns out it was. At least you're writing it fairly well. It would have been understandable if he'd caught her in the act with a strange man or something and they needed him silenced or whatever; or even if he'd seen a powerful noble naked or wearing women's clothes or...something different, something not predictable and most of all, something that involves politics! That adds something extra, that little bit more substance.
I feel as though the King is a tyrant merely for plot convenience. There's very little logic to the prisoners and their positions. Especially Sage; a nobleman being treated that way? Even the youngest son. The father would be obliged to raise a protest, if not for any actual feelings then because its politically expedient for him to do so. There is potential gain there and in any court, that's what its all about; getting the leg up on your opponents, for your faction and what not. Show us more of this world!
Maybe there's a war brewing. Maybe the people have had enough of the king or there's a new enemy. How would that affect the prison? All these things and more; show us the way the world interacts with the prison, how the outside, even if only news and rumours of it, affects the interactions of those within. Political/Religious associations and differences? This is good as it is, I guess, for something short - maybe for a school play, but you want to take it elsewhere, make it better, funnier, deeper, darker - put the characters in situations they've never been before! Medieval times; press-gang them into work of some kind, some sort of civil labour maybe? More worldly interaction! Yayness.
Take the ordinary and bitch slap the hell out of it. |
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Initiate II |
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