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Aedomir
If you hate me press alt+f4. Master of the Forum

 Gender:  Age: 14 Joined: 19 Jan 2008 Posts: 1859 Reviews: 370 Country: The fantasy of limbo, but I call it England. 300 Points
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Posted: Sun May 11, 2008 1:09 pm Post subject: Crime has Tails |
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Crime has Tails
This cost 500 points so the least you could do is read this!
If you saw my post in the lounge, you will know I have been planning a thriller storybook. Anyway, I thought I would do something about it, since I don’t know of any thriller storybooks going on at the moment. I have gone for a more extreme thriller, international etc, not a single murder. Here are the facts:
- Present day, no fantasy.
- There is no main character as such, but there are two main sides. There are the Special Forces for the country you pick, for example, CIA/FBI for the USA, MI6/MI5/SAS for the UK, and all that. It might be fun if we end up having tension between these places but anyways, it is against extremists. They can be from any country, but as with the Special Forces, make them varied! We will need a lot of players for this, so promote this as much as possible if you want it to be successful! The extremists are NOT specific to religions, can we please not have just a load of Muslims.
- The idea is, the Special Forces has been infiltrated by extremists and we need to find out who they are (go nuts!) as they have begun to lie about extremist locations, corrupting intelligence and ruining operations. Anything from soldiers to the head of the embassy is allowed…
- It would be fun to have some minor battles with SAS and that when it heats up to make it more interesting and get plot along, more thriller/action.
Aside from that, go mad and be creative!
Rules:
- No God modding.
- Keep it PG-13 please.
- Limited dialogue between characters allowed unless user specifies.
- Do NOT tell us whether you are an infiltrate or not – we should work it out fm the story.
- Two characters maximum per person and can be either side.
- Romance allowed, but keep it minimal unless relevant to the story.
Here is mine (use format please):
Name: Michael Dunn.
Age: 43
Gender: M
Embassy: UK / MI6
Rank: Head of embassy.
Personality: Hard-working, serious, can be friendly.
Description: Blue eyes, brown messy hair,
Other: None.
Enjoy! Any ideas, say in the DT here. |
_________________ We are all Sociopaths: The Prologue
Sociopath: So • ci • o • path noun
1. Someone who believes their behaviour is right.
2. Human.
Last edited by Aedomir on Mon May 12, 2008 4:50 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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Vernon
Always shall Love Elizabeth his Beautiful Goddess Epic Novelist

 Gender:  Age: 18 Joined: 09 May 2005 Posts: 3825 Reviews: 647 Country: Building a bridge to Elizabeth's heart and guiding her to mines. 300 Points
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Posted: Sun May 11, 2008 2:26 pm Post subject: |
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Name: Carlos Clooney
Age: 27
Gender: M
Embassy: UK/MI6
Rank: Rookie (Just out of University: Picked up by MI6 for exellence in computing and forenstics.
Personality: Casual, open-minded, compassionate and hardworking.
Description: Brown eyes, short black hair, with a signature cap on his head.
Other: None. |
_________________ We get off to the rhythm of the trigger and destruction. Fallujah to New Orleans with impunity to kill. We are the hidden fist of the free market.
We are the ink, we are the quill.
[The Ink And The Quill (Be Afraid) - Anti-Flag] |
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TNCowgirl
Princess of Storybooks and Queen of DTWH!! Writer of Legend

 Gender:  Age: 17 Joined: 13 May 2007 Posts: 5751 Reviews: 99 Country: USA 2094 Points
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Posted: Sun May 11, 2008 5:06 pm Post subject: |
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Name: Dusty Ryder
Age: 24
Gender: F
Embassy: The Unit. The Unit is a special forces unit that 'doesn't exist'. No one really knows about it. Bascially the people in it are assassins. Well, that and they go in and get people out when they are kidnapped. They are basically the go to people when the US doesn't want anyone to know they are involved when they really are. The people that are in it are the best of the best and have no ties at all.
(This doesn't really exist in the real world)
Rank: Loner, Loners are the people in The Unit that work on their own and rarely with a group of people.
Personality: She is tough, she doesn't take crap from anyone and isn't the biggest people's person. She used to be really sweet, compassionate and caring until her family and boyfriend were slaughtered in front of her.
Description: Her
Other: Up for love. PM me. |
_________________ Christ Paris: A guy the world gave up on. The plane he was flying disappeared Nov. 1 of this year. A few days ago the searchers gave up the search. May he prove everyone wrong and still be alive.
Vist my world and make it bigger!
Want a Readers crit??? |
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Aedomir
If you hate me press alt+f4. Master of the Forum

 Gender:  Age: 14 Joined: 19 Jan 2008 Posts: 1859 Reviews: 370 Country: The fantasy of limbo, but I call it England. 300 Points
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Posted: Sun May 11, 2008 5:16 pm Post subject: |
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| Alright, I will wait 'til we have a few more before starting. |
_________________ We are all Sociopaths: The Prologue
Sociopath: So • ci • o • path noun
1. Someone who believes their behaviour is right.
2. Human. |
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Ghostwriter
Novelist

 Gender:  Age: 14 Joined: 26 Feb 2008 Posts: 437 Reviews: 12 Country: USA 270 Points
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Posted: Sun May 11, 2008 5:32 pm Post subject: |
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Name: Ten
Age: 25
Gender: Male
Embassy: Russian Weapons dealer/inventor
Rank: One of the best in the world
Personality: Sarcastic, smart enough to avoid attention, But more then willing to kill anyone that get's in his way.
Description: always wears sunglasses, Bald head
Other: Invents his own weapons and has a track record for running. |
_________________ A person's heart is like a painting.
Because it's fragile, yet it bring's the greatest emotions to you. |
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chocoholic
Give me the chocolate and nobody gets hurt Master of the Forum

 Gender:  Age: 14 Joined: 31 May 2007 Posts: 1615 Reviews: 516 Country: Raxacoricofallapatorius 318 Points
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Posted: Sun May 11, 2008 8:35 pm Post subject: |
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Name: Chloe Jones
Age: 24
Gender: F
Embassy: UK / SAS
Rank: Soldier- Mobility Troop, Sqaudron A
Personality: Herdworking, down to earth, doesn't like to joke around
Description: Tall and skinny, bit kusckues, almost always frowning, brown hair and brown eyes.
Other: None |
_________________ *Don't expect to see me around much in the next couple of weeks. School has started again, and it'll be a couple of weeks before I've settled in. If you've asked me for a critique, you will get it, but not for a little while. Sorry* |
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RoryLegend
what the fetch Speaker of the Forum

 Gender:  Age: 16 Joined: 22 Dec 2007 Posts: 915 Reviews: 65 Country: England 340 Points
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Posted: Mon May 12, 2008 12:40 am Post subject: |
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Name: Jude (among others)
Gender: F
Age: 16
Embassy: Extremist by force/association
Specialty: Computers/Hacking
Personality: smart, qiet, stubborn, aggressive
Appearance: long dark brown hair, slender, blue eyes, tan
History: Her mother left when she was eight for reasons she didn't understand then, but does now. She has a twin brother, Jesse, who has separated himself from the family but still stays in contact with her (she doesn't know but he works for the government-secret agent), Her father is in an extremist group that is planning an attack and since she is overly good with computers and hacking she has been pulled into it and is being forced to do the computer work for the group.
Other: up for love i guess |
_________________ Youth is wasted on the young...
<3 |
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Billy
Speaker of the Forum

 Gender:  Age: 17 Joined: 24 Nov 2007 Posts: 537 Reviews: 38 Country: Australia 242 Points
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Posted: Mon May 12, 2008 12:15 pm Post subject: |
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Name: Jack
Gender: M
Age: 26
Embassy: Australia/ASIS
Rank:
Personality: He is something of an introvert and doesn't like to be around too many people for too long a time, although he is capable of holding up a conversation. He usually comes across as overconfident and a little reckless.
Appearance: Him
History: Was recruited by the Australian Secret Intelligence Service at the age of twenty two while at university. His employers soon picked up on his preference for working alone and played to his skills.
Other: up for love |
_________________ Only the impossible is worth the effort - Jeanette Winterson
Wide-eyed stupid. |
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*singerofthenight*
just stole your pickle! Wha hahaha *runs off* Speaker of the Forum

 Gender:  Age: 16 Joined: 16 Jan 2008 Posts: 748 Reviews: 52 Country: I wish i knew...*blinks* 80 Points
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Posted: Mon May 12, 2008 1:36 pm Post subject: |
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Ohhhh... I like this. About time someone created a good storybook.
Name: Satika Ferguson
Age: 24
Gender: F
Embassy: US/CIA
Rank: Spy/undercover
History: Grew up in a bad home. Her dad hates the cops, so she decided to go into the CIA just to make him mad. Never knew her mom.
Appearance: Green eyes, Waist length jet black hair. Sometime mistaken for an Indian (except for her eyes) She's petite, but muscular. (not extremely muscular) I'll post her picture later.
Other: up for love. |
_________________ Lifewas radical rightafterImetthe monster. Later,life becameharder,complicated. Ultamitely,aliving hell. Like swimmingagainst a riptide,walking thewrongdirection inthefastlaneofafreeway,wakingfrom tehsweetestdreamstofindyourselfinthemiddleofa nightmare. |
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Vernon
Always shall Love Elizabeth his Beautiful Goddess Epic Novelist

 Gender:  Age: 18 Joined: 09 May 2005 Posts: 3825 Reviews: 647 Country: Building a bridge to Elizabeth's heart and guiding her to mines. 300 Points
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Posted: Mon May 12, 2008 3:19 pm Post subject: |
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*Can I begin? If not I'll edit*
Parking his car, he sat back putting his feet up and stared at the building. MI6. Yeah, don't really get much chances like this. Not as if he was from some big posh University. More or less, it was only because he'd watched Crime Scenes Investigations, he'd chosen to enter the field. Blinking he pulled down the mirror to shield from the otherwise blazing sun.
Here he was in London, in March, and people around him were dressed in shorts, t-shirts and skirts.
Yawning he felt the worse of Hangover leaving, lucky he was quick to recover, but he'd sure miss them all. Neil, Jack, Frank and Ando. Not to mention Jackie. She just was less interested in what he wanted to do, never could of worked; it was that kiss though, that heavy, hard and passionate kiss she gave him.
It was a once in a lifetime deal though, why was he letting it bother him so much, he didn't know her that well, maybe she was a slut. Or was he kidding himself.
Opening the door with one hand he tried to remove himself from his car. After one or two attempt he became unstuck, falling flat on the road. Grabbing his cap off the ground he checked if anyone had seen him; wouldn't of been just wonderful if he had been seen.
The building stood tall, with at least 50 floors it looked. Droving his hand in the pocket he pulled out the letter of recommendation:
Dear Mr Clooney.
To make this brief, you've been recruited due to your exellence in Forenstics' and Computers' at Strathclyde University in Glasgow. We've heard many great things about you, those being, diligent worker, industrious and very able in most fields. In College Majoring in all Sciences'.
We at MI6 are always looking for people like you. You're skills pay for themselves, all we require is you leave Glasgow and take up shop in London. Lucky for us and you, we've found a fairly cheap house on Hampstead Heath.
If any further questions, please emails or Administrative Assistant at:
assistantjosie@MIservices.org
Or Phone at: 0207 38905
Yours Sincerily
Embassy Director, Michael Dunn
PS: Inside, you will find the key to house, a cardkey to get access and £500 worth. Just to settle you in.
Folding it back up he walked towards the doors, locking his car automatically.
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Listening to: Intro5pect - Conditioned Reaction
via FoxyTunes |
_________________ We get off to the rhythm of the trigger and destruction. Fallujah to New Orleans with impunity to kill. We are the hidden fist of the free market.
We are the ink, we are the quill.
[The Ink And The Quill (Be Afraid) - Anti-Flag] |
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Aedomir
If you hate me press alt+f4. Master of the Forum

 Gender:  Age: 14 Joined: 19 Jan 2008 Posts: 1859 Reviews: 370 Country: The fantasy of limbo, but I call it England. 300 Points
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Posted: Mon May 12, 2008 5:06 pm Post subject: |
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*We have begun people!*
Michael Dunn
Michael flipped the file shut, and turned to the window. Below the glass building hundreds - thousands - of people busied across the city centre, buying booze and renting out DVDs, constantly calling their beloved and meeting business rulers. He wondered if his life would ever be that easy. It wasn't that he regretted signing up for MI6, it's just that he missed his normal life. He smiled at the thought, when he realised this was his normality.
That was a novelty; smiling. He'd thought he'd forgotten how to.
Twisting his crooked neck, Michael span round to his laptop and opened his email account; five new messages in ten minutes. He really needed another secretary. Trouble was, his paranoir kept most of them away. He sighed. Bloody Americans he thought, as he opened the first message.
A tap shook the door, and a short woman dressed in entirely black entered, a white folder in her arms.
"Have you seen this?" his voice boomed, "The CIA wants access to our JB-40 Nuke prototype. Those people are always stealin' our ideas."
"When we're not stealing theirs," muttered Kelly.
Michael sighed. "What's that?" he said, gesturing to the folder.
Kelly looked confused, when at last she shook her head, blushing as she remembered. She handed it over to Michael, who snatched it and scanned the first line, realising it was a newspaper.
"I've already got a copy of today's," he laughed.
"This is tomorrow's," said Kelly, as she made for the door, slamming it has she passed.
"But-" he stopped as he reread the headline.
Chinese Premier butchered on doorstep. |
_________________ We are all Sociopaths: The Prologue
Sociopath: So • ci • o • path noun
1. Someone who believes their behaviour is right.
2. Human. |
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TNCowgirl
Princess of Storybooks and Queen of DTWH!! Writer of Legend

 Gender:  Age: 17 Joined: 13 May 2007 Posts: 5751 Reviews: 99 Country: USA 2094 Points
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Posted: Mon May 12, 2008 5:43 pm Post subject: |
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***ok, so we need all our people at the same place, so my girl is going to loudon. ***
Dusty---
Dusty packed her bags slipping her computer in her carry on bag last. She stripped down to her undergarments and started attaching her weapons. Two knives on each leg and a gun on the right one. Then she had two knives on her wrists. She pulled her jeans on, they were bagging, but not obviously baggy. She pulled a tanktop on then a trenchcoat and looked in the mirror. She lastly attached a gun to her waist and then slipped a knife in her hair that looked like a hair pin. She smiled at her refelection then grabbed her things and walked down to her taxis.
"Take me to the airport, please." She said handing him some money. "On the double."
"Yes, ma'am."
*Ok, you can have her show up. But she won't be nice mind you.* |
_________________ Christ Paris: A guy the world gave up on. The plane he was flying disappeared Nov. 1 of this year. A few days ago the searchers gave up the search. May he prove everyone wrong and still be alive.
Vist my world and make it bigger!
Want a Readers crit??? |
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Aedomir
If you hate me press alt+f4. Master of the Forum

 Gender:  Age: 14 Joined: 19 Jan 2008 Posts: 1859 Reviews: 370 Country: The fantasy of limbo, but I call it England. 300 Points
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Posted: Mon May 12, 2008 6:16 pm Post subject: |
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*Alright, we could have just talked on phone, but alright!*
Michael Dunn
Swinging the door open, Micahel hurried from his office, into the main room. He stood to the front of everyone, pen at the ready as he turned to the whiteboard. A few people cast their eyes towards him, as he busily started writing. At last, he threw the pen behind him and called for attention.
"Can I ask who did this?" he boomed, as people busied into their seats. "Who was it, that felt the need to visit The Times?"
The listeners began murmuring a few words amongst themselves. "Perhaps I phrased that wrong," muttered Michael. "Who the bloody hell just gave permission for The Times to publish this?" he roared, slamming down the newspaper on a nearby desk.
A weedy boy stood up. "You?" asked Michael.
"What - n-no!" he stammered. "I just wanted to say that with all due respect sir, it's just a lie, I mean, let them worry about it, but we can assure them it never happened."
"Si' down boy," said Michael. "Officials are coming over to discuss the matter."
"But what matter sir? These things happen all the time - just lies, even if people do believe it, he's on the telly, look!" A man grabbed the T.V. remote, and flipped to the Chinese channel. "There!" he said, as a live camera focused on Wen Jiabao. He was muttering a foreign tongue, what he was saying was pointless, as Michael wondered why it mattered, since after all, the fact of getting people to believe them wasn't the point it was-
A gunshot was fired.
People were screaming.
The Premier fell over, dead. |
_________________ We are all Sociopaths: The Prologue
Sociopath: So • ci • o • path noun
1. Someone who believes their behaviour is right.
2. Human. |
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TNCowgirl
Princess of Storybooks and Queen of DTWH!! Writer of Legend

 Gender:  Age: 17 Joined: 13 May 2007 Posts: 5751 Reviews: 99 Country: USA 2094 Points
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Posted: Mon May 12, 2008 6:33 pm Post subject: |
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Dusty:
Dusty walked into the room just as the fire was shot and the man fell dead on the TV. She saw the newspaper article and frowned.
"Looks like someone is having problems with the Newsman." She said crossing her arms and looking for the head person. She spotted him, the one holding the newspaper. "Mr. Dunn, may I have a word with you?" She asked walking towards him. A big guy stepped in front of her.
"Who the blood hell do you think you are walking in here with no badge!" He demanded. She frowned.
"Doesn't matter. I have persmission to be here, now kindly move before I'm forced to make you." She growled looking up at him. Her mind was calculating how hard of a blow to any of the weak points it would take to knock him down.
*tell me if this doesn't work, if it doesn't PM me and I'll delete it.* |
_________________ Christ Paris: A guy the world gave up on. The plane he was flying disappeared Nov. 1 of this year. A few days ago the searchers gave up the search. May he prove everyone wrong and still be alive.
Vist my world and make it bigger!
Want a Readers crit??? |
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Aedomir
If you hate me press alt+f4. Master of the Forum

 Gender:  Age: 14 Joined: 19 Jan 2008 Posts: 1859 Reviews: 370 Country: The fantasy of limbo, but I call it England. 300 Points
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Posted: Mon May 12, 2008 6:58 pm Post subject: |
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*Not, it's fine. *
Michael Dunn
His jaw fell as he watched the Premier die, and people scream as the camera darkened. "Woah..." someone said.
Michael turned, half in trance, to a see a woman behind him, quite young and friendly-looking. "Hello," she said, lightly American accented.
"Hold on..." Michael said, rubbing is forehead. The article said the Premier was assassinated at 16:30. He checked his watch. 16:30 exactly. "Kelly!" he called. No answer. "Kelly!" Nothing "Damn," he growled.
"I take it your the assassin," he said, as the silent people around him broke into conversations, shock all around.
"Well, sort of. I work for Unit," she replied. "I'm Dusty Ryder."
"Dusty, eh?" He smiled. "Alright then, I'm Michael Dunn." He held out his hand, but she ignored him and walked past. "You arried earlier than I thought," Michael said. "I called the meeting four minutes ago."
"I came on... other business, shall we say, or rather, the same business."
Michael scratched his head. "What?"
"Shall we?" she said, pointing to his office. |
_________________ We are all Sociopaths: The Prologue
Sociopath: So • ci • o • path noun
1. Someone who believes their behaviour is right.
2. Human. |
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