Topic ID: 30505
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shadepelt
Junior Writer
Gender: 
Age: 14
Joined: 19 Aug 2008
Posts: 30
Reviews: 8
Country: Oz
300 Points
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 Posted: Fri Aug 22, 2008 2:24 am Post subject: |
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| it;s really great. the description was pretty god, but I wish you gave us more time to learn about the characters. It is very interesting, and i liked the whole thing! |
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XxxDo
Oh, life..
Novelist
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Age: 16
Joined: 29 Mar 2008
Posts: 384
Reviews: 87
Country: Switzerland and The Netherlands
374 Points
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| Posted: Sat Aug 30, 2008 8:02 pm Post subject: |
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Thanks for the comments!!
Shadepelt: Thanks, I agree, I should work on defining the characters more.
WannaBeAuthor: Thanks!!
XxxDo |
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DoubleTake
Novice
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Age: 14
Joined: 05 Jan 2008
Posts: 10
Reviews: 4
300 Points
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| Posted: Sat Sep 06, 2008 10:01 am Post subject: |
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| Wonderful, excellent built up suspense. Very thoughtfully written in a fantastic style. I was drawn in! A few easy to fix mistakes nothing to worry about. You should write alot, this is fantastic work and i would read more! Try to strongly build up your characters, give the reader a really strong relationship and then hit them with something shocking! It always works!!!! |
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Fellow
Senior Writer
Gender:
Age: 17
Joined: 04 Sep 2008
Posts: 186
Reviews: 58
Country: Romania
185 Points
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| Posted: Sat Sep 06, 2008 12:51 pm Post subject: Ok |
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Ok... Amazing! I was holding my breath as i was reading. I`ll go at my school and always look over my shoulder from this day forward. It`s very sad that this things actually happen.
Anyway to come back at the main subject. I loved how you`ve wrote the end. It`s like you lived that, you came back from the dead and wrote it -.-`. |
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XxxDo
Oh, life..
Novelist
Gender:
Age: 16
Joined: 29 Mar 2008
Posts: 384
Reviews: 87
Country: Switzerland and The Netherlands
374 Points
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| Posted: Sat Sep 06, 2008 1:12 pm Post subject: |
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Thanks for the comments!
And Fellow; don't worry, I'm not a zombie 
XxxDo |
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NightsDreamer2277
Writer
Gender:
Age: 18
Joined: 02 Jan 2008
Posts: 61
Reviews: 34
Country: USA
300 Points
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| Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 2:57 pm Post subject: |
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| Wow. Your title interested me because "Click, Click, Boom" is an inside thing among my friends. It was very well written, and I didn't find any obvious errors in it. Your plot is good as is the details you draw you reader in with. The ending holds just enough drama to make it believable, though I think it would be nice if we could know a few more thoughts that he has while the timer is ticking downward. Over all, it was well done, and I enjoyed reading it. |
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XxxDo
Oh, life..
Novelist
Gender:
Age: 16
Joined: 29 Mar 2008
Posts: 384
Reviews: 87
Country: Switzerland and The Netherlands
374 Points
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| Posted: Sun Sep 14, 2008 7:45 pm Post subject: |
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Hey,
thanks for the comment 
XxxDo |
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