(I'm not quite sure which forum I should have posted this on. It's about an online game that takes place in medieval times so I don't know if it should be in Fantasy Fiction or Sci-Fi.)
(Anyway, this is a new story I've just started. The reason why I started it is because there's a scholarship program where you have to write a conventional story of 100 to 224 pages long for an age group of 12-18 years old. If my story wins not only will I get $1000-$7500 in scholarship money, I'll also get a publishing deal with a company called Random House! That being the case I need everyone to be as honest as possible with their critiques. Since The story has to be conventional I decided to base it on something everyone in that age group can relate to, VIDEO GAMES!)
Chapter 1:
The light from the sun crept through the blinds of a young boy’s bedroom as he slept peacefully in his bed. He had stayed up late playing on his computer the night before. Since it was Saturday he was allowed to stay in bed longer than normal. He groaned when the beams from the sun reached his face, causing him to wake up. Wondering what time it was he rolled onto his side to check his clock.
“Seven-thirty,” he said, his voice groggy with sleep. Most kids his age were still asleep at this time. He groaned again as he buried his head under his pillow and tried to get back to sleep.
His bedroom door suddenly swung open, slamming into the wall behind it. “It’s here! It’s here!”
The boy lifted his pillow to see his sister jumping up and down with excitement. She held a large box in her hands that bore a popular gaming company logo. He yawned as he lifted the pillow off his face and sat up. “What’s here, Amelia?”
“The game! It came in the mail this morning!”
The boy sighed as he flopped back onto his bed and placed his pillow back on his face. “That’s great, now let me go back to sleep…”
“Ryan!” Amelia placed the box on the floor before marching over to his bed and shaking her brother. “Come on, wake up! You said yourself you couldn’t wait for the game to get here! Don’t you want to play it?”
Ryan rolled onto his stomach, moving his pillow so it stayed over his head. “I do but I’m too tired to get up right now. Let me sleep in for a few more hours…”
“You can’t sleep in!” Amelia told him, “We’re going to Granma and Granpa’s house at lunch. If we don’t hook it up now we won’t be able to play at all today!”
“Well, why don’t you hook it up?” he asked.
“I can’t! You know how bad I am with computers, and Mom and Dad are still asleep.”
“Can’t you give me ten more minutes?”
Amelia started pushing him again, urging him to get out of bed. “No, it has to be now! We have to get as much game time as we can!”
Ryan sighed, “Fine, fine, I’ll get up.” Amelia cheered as she ran to the Epicom box and began to tear it open. It was like watching a six-year-old open a present on Christmas morning. Ryan climbed out of bed and helped his sister start taking things out of the box.
Ryan was thirteen-years-old and attending middle school. His twelve-year-old sister, Amelia was attending the same school as him. They grew up and were still living in Toronto, one of the largest cities in Canada. Summer was starting in two months, since Ryan was currently attending grade eight he would be transferring to high school after summer vacation. Since Amelia was only in grade seven she’ll be staying at her old school when Ryan moves on. They were both disappointed by the fact that they wouldn’t be going to the same school next year, but they decided to make the most of their summer together before Ryan transferred.
The box that had arrived in the mail was for a new gaming system that had just been released onto the market by a Canadian gaming company called Epicom. The company was founded five years ago in 2003 and focuses mostly on massive multiplayer online role-playing games, or MMORPG’s for short. The pilot game for their system is called Arcadia Online. The game itself takes place sometime in the medieval ages, as most RPG’s do and everyone in the world will be playing it. The great thing about this game however that set it apart from others was the fact that it was the only one on the market that uses a virtual reality visors and gloves. Both Ryan and Amelia had tried a beta demo version one day at the mall. The game play was outstanding and the graphics were breathtaking, it was just like real life. The player sees the world through the visor and during battle uses the gloves to fight and cast magic. There were even speakers and a microphone built into the visor so the player could communicate with other people on the game. They had spent six months saving their allowances together so they could buy the game as soon as it came out.
The game system consisted of a small circular box with four ports for the visors and gloves. It came with two wires, one to plug into the T.V. and the other to plug into a computer modem. Without the modem the game couldn’t connect to the server. The reason why it had to hook up to a T.V. was so it could display things like the server connection, Internet speed and other important things. The actually game itself takes place on the visor screen.
Soon the game was hooked up and ready to go. As they began to put on the equipment Amelia said, “Aren’t you excited?”
“Yeah, I’ve been dying to play this game ever since we played the demo.”
“I know. This is going to be awesome!” They turned on the system and dove into the game.
Also, would you mind sharing the link for this scholarship? It sounds like a great contest.
