Young Writers Society

Walking in late afternoon,
through trees whose bare branches
stretch up to touch the pale blue sky,
happiness is prevalent within me.
My dog pants at my side,
the sunlight reflecting off his golden fur.
Leaves crunch underfoot,
and the crisp breeze sends a few flying,
careening against each other,
spinning madly across the ground.
A few still cling to the branches,
but those, too, are sent
floating down through the air around me.
Between these dances the wind creates,
the sun's rays warm my cheeks,
and summer reappears for an instant,
but then the chilly gusts return,
and I am reminded that winter is not far off.
I stop to sit by a sparkling stream,
feeling the calmness and blissful peace
envelop me in a soft, gentle hug.
My dog lays beside me, my constant companion,
his fur so warm on my cold fingertips;
his playful tongue licks my cheek,
causing a smile to form on my lips.
Together we watch as the sun sets,
turning the sky and landscape a golden, fiery orange.
When the glow on the horizon finally begins to fade,
signaling the coming of a deep blue night,
I stand and turn for home, my dog trailing behind through the leaves.

Wow..just wow. I could really feel everything that you were saying. Like I could feel the sun's rays and hear the dog panting. You definatly have some potential in being a poet. You have a real gift. That was amazing.

Hello mello!

I enjoyed reading your poem because the pacing was just as if dog-walking and your descriptions were clear and transposing. I think some editing is in order, trim the fat and sculpt out the essence of this poem, as some lines or phrasing are superfluous, but that is expected in prose-poetry. I think an area that's worth further developing is here:

and I am reminded that winter is not far off.