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Young Writers Society


Misshaped Words Revised



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78 Reviews



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Fri Oct 21, 2011 12:15 am
davantageous says...



More often than not,
my words are skewed,
by those not fond
of the poets feud.

Among the worst, are those
who are ignorant and confused.
And these who are prone to judge
are bereft without a clue.

Among the best, are those
who identify with me,
by simply and smoothly
writing poetry.
Last edited by davantageous on Fri Oct 21, 2011 1:20 am, edited 1 time in total.
Davantageous
  





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Fri Oct 21, 2011 12:20 am
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WriteWriter says...



Wow. This is the perfect poem about poetry and words. I found nothing wrong with your layout or punctuation or grammar so overall that was very well done. As for the poem itself, it describes everything in a way that's not too easy yet not too hard to explain and I think that's a great quality to have in poetry. I really don't understand why someone who is younger than you still gets a thank you even when they really don't know how to write a review that well, namely me. But anyway, I found this poem very well written. Great job and keep writing.
I Know I Can Wish Upon A Star But My Past Is My Past, And That Includes Last Night And Yesterday.
  





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Fri Oct 21, 2011 12:23 am
kaylamarie004 says...



Finally, a poem that doesn't need any improvement as far as i can tell. I love it; you expressed poetry well and i understand clearly what you were trying to say. No corrections here, in my opinion.
- Kayla
  





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Fri Oct 21, 2011 12:52 am
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shiney1 says...



I really like this. This is what I miss, and I totally agree with you.

Nowadays some people take it too far, and put barriers as to how elaborate poetry should be. Sometimes, when people are done putting all the bells and whistles and huge words (that nobody normally would know) in, the poem sounds more like a philosophy paper than a poem. And when someone else writes a nice simple poem, they find it hard to see it as an actual poem and ridicule what used to be standard. I really like this poem, especially its simplicity.

I do have a few corrections, however.

More often than not,
my words are skewed,
by those not fond
of the poets feud. Very nice opening.

Among the worst, are those
who are ignorant and confused
and these are prone to judge
although they may be bereft without a clue. This last line is too long compared to all of the other lines, and greatly disrupts the poem's flow. Maybe if you shortened it, this stanza would sound much better.

Among the best, are those
who identify with me,
by simply and smoothly
writing poetry. Lovely ending.


Not much to pick at at all. Nice work!
"If you ever have a problem don't say 'Hey God I have a big problem.' Rather 'Hey Problem... I have a big God and it's all going to be okay."
  





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78 Reviews



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Points: 4257
Reviews: 78
Fri Oct 21, 2011 1:17 am
davantageous says...



Among the worst, are those
who are ignorant and confused
and these are prone to judge
are bereft without a clue.



new second stanza
Davantageous
  





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Fri Oct 21, 2011 3:53 am
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Dreamworx95 says...



Hey davantageous,

I love how you put kooky rhyming words togher like "fued" and "skewed"

My favorite stanzas are the first and the last. And the second stanza sounds much smoother in your edit.

Cool poem!
  





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Thu Oct 27, 2011 4:52 pm
bexy89 says...



I like this poem, it's simple but it works, if that makes sense. Very well written. I particularly like the second stanza. However I think 'misshapen' is the right word? Unless you have deliberately used 'misshaped' and it's gone right over my head!

Becki
"I'll be writing until I can't write anymore. It's a compulsion with me. I love writing." J.K.Rowling

My Website: www.beckitedford.com
  





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Thu Dec 01, 2011 9:13 am
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murtuza says...



Hey, davantageous!

This is a great poem and is so smooth from beginning to end. The first stanza is a great opening and delves into the context right away. I greatly enjoyed this piece and I'm looking forward to reading more. Keep the ink flowing!

Murtuza
:)
It's not about the weight of what's spoken.
It's about being heard.
  








Who's the more foolish, the fool, or the fool who follows him?
— Obi-Wan Kenobi