Young Writers Society

I used picture two as inspiration!


The candle in the window
keeps the darkness at bay.
Its warm, gentle glow
announces the coming day.

The candle in the window,
burns strong and bright.
Proving that no woe
can stand against its might.

The candle in the window
fills the house with warmth.
Is it from the heat it bestows?
Or the spirit it brings forth?

Well done. I enjoyed the fact that you portrayed the candle's warmth and light in different way. I also liked the question you asked at the end. It tied up the poem very nicely. I have one comment on the seventh and eighth line.

[quoteProving that no woe
can stand under its might][/quote]

It does not make much sense to me when you said," stand under its might". I think that using the word 'above' sounds better.

Rarity ♦

This is great, from the first to last line. I didn't see any grammatical errors, but there are a few things I think you could do to improve upon this piece. First, try to balance the syllable in each line. When you read some parts, it is a bit awkward, not flowing quite right. In addition to this, separating the poem into stanzas might be a good idea. It's like in a book: people don't want to read 200 pages without a break, so we make chapters. Same concept. I really like the poem, though, and it really does describe the feeling you get from that picture.I also like the rhyme scheme. It's one that I also use in a lot of poems. You have a really great poem here. I think it could win.