Young Writers Society

I rested my head on his shoulder as a montage in Letters to Juliet, my favorite movie, began.

"Please, remind me why we're watching a chick flick." His dazzling eyes stared into mine and as he put his arm around me, my heart melted.

"Because I'm a chick, and you let me pick the flick. Besides, this is one of my favorite movies." I smiled and rested my hand on his chest, then brushed his knee. I positioned myself towards him and pulled the blanket a little closer to me.

As the montage to Love Story played on, I looked around me. It was a beautiful and chilly September evening. The sunset was peeking through the shades of his back patio windows. It was dim enough to see the movie, but the candlelight was strong enough to see the features of his face.

It's a love story, baby, just say yes. He leaned over to stroke my cheek and brush the hair off my face. My heart started pounding faster. He held the small of my back and tilted my head toward his. He brushed my cheek, then his soft lips found mine. I could see sparks fly as my lips pressed against his. There was nothing else in the moment but the kiss; it was passionate and carefree, daring and careful.

He pulled away, but I wanted more. I kissed him again, this time more aggressive. I ran my fingers through his soft, curly hair, and he twirled locks of mine. He pinned me down on the couch and kissed until we had to stop for air. He started to unbutton my shirt, but I pulled a curl of his hair back with a mishchevious smile. I kissed him again, pushing him back so that I would be on top. He paused to stare at my slightly open and revealing shirt with a smirk. He kissed me again, this time more aggressive than ever. He tried to feel up the back of my shirt, but I stopped him by pulling away.

"My lips are sore." I ran my fingers through his hair once more.

"Mine too." He said with his trademark smirk. "I like it when you play with my hair."

Despite my remark about my lips, he kissed me again. But this time, it was different. He brushed his tongue on my lips. He put my head in his hands and explored my mouth with his tongue slowly and softly. I held his neck with one hand and played with his hair with the other. His hands, earlier at my hips, slid lower. Our bodies and lips pressed together. The kiss said it all. I pulled away and smiled. He smiled back.

"You said your lips were sore. You never said anything about your tongue."

I laughed. By now the credits were rolling and Colbie Calliat was singing What If.

"What if we were made for each other?" I sang along. The lyrics went perfectly with .. well, us.

"Born to become best friends and lovers." He smiled. Our foreheads met. "I love you."

"I love you, too." I breathed. Our lips were like magnets.

Colbie sang on, "I want to stay right here, in this moment, over and over and over again." <3

Hey there,
First off, it looks as though you're new to YWS, so welcome
The title popped out at me because I love 'Love Story' by Taylor Swift- and I thought I'd tell you I think this story is really sweet. It was mushy, but I almost always like the mushy stories, so it's a good thing.
The fact that your characters are watching a newer movie sets the story in time, which is good- and you're also very descriptive of the scenario and your characters.

It was a beautiful and chilly September evening. The sunset was peeking through the shades of his back patio windows. It was dim enough to see the movie, but the candlelight was strong enough to see the features of his face.

- I especially liked this bit, it really set the scene.

Your grammar and spelling all seem to be in order, unless I missed something, so nice job!
Overall I truly enjoyed this

-Briggsy

Hello! You sure are a new face around here. Don't worry, you'll learn quickly enough that ((for the most part)) we don't bite. . . Or, at least, we try not to draw blood. Anyway, onto the actual review. . .

*squeal* Oh. My. Goodness. This was wonderful!!! I'm so lad that I stumbled across your work, so that I could read it. This piece was romantic, sensual, passionate, and had just a hint of sultry mixed in with it.

The opening to the piece was tactful and smart, and immersed us in the scene very quickly. Your dialogue was intermittent throughout the entire piece, and served, first, to characterize the two characters in a deep, meaningful way, and, two, it highlighted the love that the two felt for each other.

Once this kissing started, I thought I was in heaven. That is not to say that I am a pervert by any means, but, rather, the elegant way in which you wove the scene of passion spoke to the romantic within myself.

The way in which the lyrics to the songs matched the scene was artistic, to say in the very least. I've never seen anything quite like that, yet I'm glad that now I have.

Oh. And bonus points for using a movie that I love.

Keep writing, I look forward to more greatness from you!

Yours truly,
Pyro

aww so cute! and awseome grammer i love it!

Well, I had just finished the prequel, but I couldnt stop reading so I skipped over here and read this!

First off, I want to say how much I love these stories. The characters are very easy to relate to and everything. These stories may become my new addiction.

I have nothing critical to say about spelling or grammar. Excelent job there.
I also have nothing critical to say about the story itself. In fact, you may want to put all of these together as a novel when you are done.

So, in conclusion, Wonderful job, and I look forward to reading more!

Sincerely,
LostMagi

Hi there!

"Because I'm a chick, and you let me pick the flick."

I loved this answer! It's really funny.

This is a great piece. To me it's basically the description of a kiss and you did a great job doing just that. I usually don't read stuff like this because I don't like mushy, but I enjoyed reading this. You got inside your character's head and told me what she was doing, how she was feeling and what she was thinking.

Overall this is a great story. Keep writing!