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Young Writers Society


Shadow Runner



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12 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 2407
Reviews: 12
Sat Oct 23, 2010 6:10 pm
dreamybanana says...



Ok, this is the first time I'm posting something on this site. All comments welcome with open arms. Thx for reading.

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Shadow Runner
Prologue

My mother died of ovarian cancer fourteen hours ago.

I should have known something was wrong from the way that she finally accepted her fate with a disturbing serenity. I asked myself – is this the same woman, who just last month had screamed for no more experimental treatments, that when she gave me life I took much away from her? I should have spotted the void of erratic emotions and protected my father. He wasn’t ready for her passing, not in the way I was.

After my careless mistake, I sprinted to the same place I went every time I had something to run from, but on this visit I was sure of my purpose. It’s where I sit right now, doubling back over my thoughts, second guessing my skills and rethinking my conclusions. In the end, I know that nothing will change unless I do this.

I peer over the edge of the three story sports centre and let the wind comb through my sharp black hair. From here I can see the horizontal pole sticking out from the building. Years back it wielded a Union Jack, but now it’s bare. Apart from that, the bricks set out a smooth path down; no window ledges to catch my heel on and no ‘hero pedestrian’, thinking that he chanced to walk by as some sign to save me. Halfway down to my right just one brick pokes out from the wall around the vent. Plumes of gas retch out from it, reeking of pollution. Below that is the cemented ground of a car park, decorated with lightning shaped cracks. The only shrubbery is the weeds that have poked through these crevices; nothing will break my fall.

Ten years ago when I was six, this place changed my life. Knowing of this impact was another thing. I was always a natural at gymnastics but being scouted by a renowned institute for future athletes named ‘Occulex’ never really mattered to me. It was years later when I found out who they really are did I start to plan for this moment, where I realised my fate had already been carved out before me like a tailored set of combat clothes. All I need to do is step forward and wear them. And after that, jump.

This is it. Fear of death will no longer hold me back; I can only fear myself, how far I will go.

I dive off the building.

My stomach lurches back - a sensation I live for. My sense of smell is whipped away as I hurtle downwards towards the cracks. They draw nearer and for a second I doubt. I reach out.

A crunch and a slap harmonise as I seize the pole. It jolts, reverberating. My body coils around the pole, feeding my momentum into a swing, slowing down. Then I propel myself towards the vent, balancing on the brick with ease. It was a larger platform than I expected and I am able to grab a fair amount of ledge with my right hand. From here I run down the wall, hanging before the vent with my strong grip. If I hadn’t been wearing my running gloves, I would have lost a clean layer of skin from that trick, but I guess part of me knew I would need them today...

The rest is easy. My running gloves turn the haggard blades of the vent into a ladder, and after that there’s just a one story drop. When I hit the ground I roll just in case and then check for damages; not even a scratch.

I stand back at marvel at the moves I had just pulled off, one’s I had planned since I was ten. Now I know I am capable of anything.

You see, I’m a Shadow Runner. My job is to complete delegated tasks with only the clothes on my back and a traqu gun tucked onto my belt, using the environment resourcefully and efficiently. I’m the most valuable implement that the off-government holds, yet my life is not worth the coffin it would take to bury me in – if it was, would they let me climb up buildings? Nonetheless, it’s who I am. My identity.

Let me show you the life of a Shadow Runner.
It's hard to find angels in hell...
...aqui en la oscuridad se quien soy.
  





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18 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 1132
Reviews: 18
Sat Oct 23, 2010 7:07 pm
NeutronStar says...



Very interesting, but rather sudden. Maybe elaborate more on her mother's death, but the description and the way you get into the heart of the character is very good. The way you use techniques almost like foreshadowing work suprisingly well. I look forward to seeing more. :)
You mustn't be afraid to dream a little BIGGER, darling ~ Inception
  





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106 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 1626
Reviews: 106
Sat Oct 23, 2010 8:32 pm
Funkymomo says...



Wow. That was really good! You put good emotion into It at the beginning and didn't let the character cry about her mom the whole time. You added depth of the character and made the reader want to know more. The only critisysm I have is that you didn't give her name.( oh wait, I just found out it was a novel and you did give her a name) That can be good sometimes but personally I would like to know her name.
Light one candle instead of cursing the darkness.
  





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Points: 1040
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Sat Oct 23, 2010 10:27 pm
ivanmarrero0211 says...



I liked it. Although the events are rather abrupt, you’ve made a solid character, who won’t cry about her mom’s death in the entire selection.
  





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Gender: Female
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Wed Oct 27, 2010 4:22 pm
daydreamer96 says...



Your story is very intresting. Your details helped me imagine things and it felt like I was really there with the character. Great story :)
  





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5 Reviews



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Points: 1087
Reviews: 5
Thu Oct 28, 2010 3:31 am
ashleysweeney says...



great story. i can't wait to read more. I think your character comes off as a very strong, independent, young woman. bravo!
  





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Points: 300
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Wed Nov 10, 2010 5:19 am
WolfDeathFang says...



wow very very very very very very very very very very very very good i can't believe your so good i'm not so bravo!!
The Wolf is everywhere in everyone and is waiting for its prey to relax his/her senses
  





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Wed Nov 10, 2010 5:19 am
WolfDeathFang says...



wow very very very very very very very very very very very very good i can't believe your so good i'm not so bravo!!
The Wolf is everywhere in everyone and is waiting for its prey to relax his/her senses
  





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35 Reviews



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Points: 1408
Reviews: 35
Sun Jan 30, 2011 5:18 am
aquababe says...



It's good, very good. It makes me want to read more. Are you planning on posting another part? You're a talented writer. Good job. :D
  





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12 Reviews



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Points: 1104
Reviews: 12
Mon May 09, 2011 11:05 pm
synismysyn3 says...



kick ass story (: you havve such a way with words Revieww minee
  








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