Young Writers Society

The Truth

I sighed. I couldn’t accept the bizarre Truth that Rune had told me. I stared out of the window of the building. The sun was shining, leaves waving in the breeze, children laughing, parents watching.
How could that Truth be true? It’s impossible to believe, unless you had seen it. I pressed my slender fingers against the warmth of my face, then pressing my hand against the cold pane of glass. The surface blurred from the heat. Removing my hand, I stared through the glass and saw the Truth…

I woke up.
It was that dream again.
I stared at the ceiling above me while I lay on the bed, the covers on the floor. In the bed opposite me, Rowe snored away; content and at peace. I stared at him from the corner of my eye. How could he be so relaxed while those chains slowly bind his soul?
“Amethyst?”
Rowe was awake now. He was sat up, leaning on both arms for support. He wasn’t wearing a top, so his tanned muscles gleamed in the dull light from the street lamps from the street below. I was still fully dressed.
“Can’t sleep?” Rowe grinned sheepishly.
“And what about you? I asked, closing my eyes. I heard him shuffle around his covers.
“Just need a drink, then I’ll be snoring like a baby again.”
I heard the bed springs move and groan in protest, and felt the warm breath on my face. I opened my eyes and stared into his.
“No reaction, how boring.” Rowe grinned, climbing off my bed, “You have no emotions, so you don’t react emotionally. But I expected something.” He stopped when he saw me place a short blade into my hair. “Oh, maybe you do.”
“I have many weapons on my body, mainly for the element of surprise attacks.”
Rowe blushed, “Oh, so a guy like you is well armed then.” A light came into his eyes. “Can I look for them?”
“Why?”
“Because, I want to check out your small body; like how can it be strong?”

***

“That HURT!” Rowe wailed the next morning. He was sat on the same table in the café, complaining to the young waitress. “I was just talking to him, and then I felt a bump on my head this morning! Jeeze! I can still feel it!”
“I believe you deserved it.” I said lightly to him as I joined him at the table, “I never expected you to pull that one on me.”
The waitress giggled as Rowe scowled. I gave her my usual order, then shooed her away.
“I found a poster thin morning, ‘John Clever’” I placed the freshly printed poster onto the table, “he is worth about 17’000gr.”
Rowe seemed uninterested, “he’s cheap. Any better money bags?” the waitress returned with our orders, “we are low on money.” Hearing this, the waitress frowned as she placed the trays down on our table.
I looked at her reassuringly, “don’t worry, it’s on a tab.”
Unconvinced the waitress scurried over to the bar.
“Hey, I mean it,” Rowe whispered
“You may be low, but I am not.” I sipped at my ice tea. Rowe pulled a face at my glass.
“I was wondering, Amethyst is because you family did stuff with precious stones. But why that? It does not match your personality.” He stared at me, “Jet or Diamond would suit you more.” He picked at his muffin.
“True, but as I’m a jeweler, being named Ami was my mother’s idea. But my father wanted me to be named after a jewel or stone. So I was called Amethyst instead. Mainly my feminine looks tack on that name.”
Rowe shook his head, “so they wanted to call you Ami? But ain’t that a-“
“Sirs, your bill.” The waitress returned.
“Thank you.” I dug into my pocket and gave the waitress a silver token. “It’s from the TOPAZ Organization, so just place it under the scanner and the bill will be paid in full.”
Rowe and the waitress stared at the token. The waitress took the token and Rowe whistled, “Wow, you are from that place. Scary…”
“Scary?”
Rowe regarded me with a suspicious look, “The TOPAZ Organization owns us Sweepers. They pay us right, so why they would fund their employee’s expenses is stupid, unless…”
“You own thirty percent of the company in shares.”
“Yes, unless you own thirty percent of the – What!” Rowe choked on a mouthful of his muffin, “You own a percentage of that company? Why the hell are you a Sweeper then?”
“I’m a Sweeper because I want to be. I just can’t watch crimes occurring when I have the power to stop them.”
The waitress, still examining the silver piece, eventually nodded, “Mr. Quartz, I’ll see to your payment.”
“Thank you”
Rowe just sat in silence, picking at a chocolate chip in his muffin.
“We should be leaving soon.”
Rowe frowned, “Oi, you can’t just dismiss the fact that you are involved with that company and think that I’m gonna be fine with it,” he clenched his fists; and his muffin.
I turned and stared straight into his eyes, “If you don’t like it, then leave. I am under no obligation to have you accompany me by your standards.”
“Jeez, sorry mate,” he blushed, “look, you’re the biggest mystery out there and to frank, you’re very strange – You’ve got a weird name, your family are jewelers, you work for and own the largest company on the universe, you look like a girl, and you hunt bounties in the most mysterious way. Not to mention the fact that everyone knows your reputation!”
I sighed as I placed my empty glass on the table, “I am sure that I am not the biggest mystery in the universe; on this planet, maybe.”
Rowe frowned, dumping his muffin – or what was left of it – back down on the plate in front of him, “What in blazes tar nation is a greater mystery than you?”
“Blazes what?”
“Its’ old country American, basically meaning ‘what the hell!’” He explained matter-of-factly.
“Oh.”
“Well?” he leaned forward over the table top towards me.
“The Truth.”
“Yes, yes. I want the truth.”
No, you don’t want it.”
“What on – “ Rowe was getting agitated.
“Not here.”
Those two words silenced him. We both continued to just sit until the waitress returned with my silver token.

Sorry it took ages....I lost my paper draft...I put it somwhere safe....thing is I forgot where...lol
Enjoy.
PS: this is a novel so plaese read from beginning if you dont get it, coz you wont get the story from just this topic
Fantasy

Megsug,
Thankyou for reading and commenting on my work. I've just reread my work, and I've also noticed all these punctuation errors. I should have read it though properly before posting, but I was in a hurry, as I only had two minutes before I had to log out. Answers to Questions shall be PMed to you privately as I don't want to spoiler it. but I'll only answer questions which are blantantly obvious. Chapter four is on my typing up list after Geography and Media HW.
Fantasy

Hey,
I'm so glad this finally got posted. I was waiting as patiently as I could...
Now to the review, I thought it started a little odd. I know it's a new chapter, but there's no flow from chapter two. Which is fine but at the same time... I don't like it. There's not much you can do about it now since you've already written this chapter. Keep it in mind for later chapters maybe. It's just a suggestion.

Fantasydotcom wrote:The Truth

I sighed. I couldn’t accept the bizarre Truth that Rune had told me. I stared out of the window of the building. The sun was shining, leaves waving in the breeze, children laughing, parents watching.
How could that Truth be true? It’s impossible to believe, unless you had seen it. I pressed my slender fingers against the warmth of my face, then pressing my hand against the cold pane of glass.The surface blurred from the heat. Removing my hand, I stared through the glass and saw the Truth…

I think this should be in italics since it's a dream to seperate it from reality. Also, "The surface blurred from the heat" is a little confusing. I'm not sure if that's correct. I think I might know what you mean but it's not clear. Personally I would just cut it.
Here are my questions that don't necassarily have to be answered in this chapter. Who's Rune? Why is Truth capitalized or why is it important?

I stared at the ceiling above me while I lay on the bed, the covers on the floor. In the bed opposite me, Rowe snored away; content and at peace.

You use the semicolon wrong throughout the entire piece if I listened to my English teacher, which I did. A semicolon is only used when you have two independant clauses but you don't want to end the sentence. You would have a comma here instead.

I stared at him from the corner of my eye. How could he be so relaxed while those chains slowly bind his soul?

This is a nitpick but you can't really stare out of the corner of your eye. What chains bind his soul?

I heard the bed springs move and groan in protest, and felt the warm breath on my face. I opened my eyes and stared into his.
“No reaction, how boring.” Rowe grinned, climbing off my bed, “You have no emotions, so you don’t react emotionally. But I expected something.”

I thought this was awkward for the characters but in a good way. I like how it shows how carefree and almost childish Rowe is.

He stopped when he saw me place a short blade into my hair. “Oh, maybe you do.”

Place or take out? Why is he placing a blade in his hair at night in their hotel room?

Rowe blushed, “Oh, so a guy like you is well armed then.” A light came into his eyes. “Can I look for them?”
“Why?”
“Because, I want to check out your small body; like how can it be strong?”
Is Rowe hitting on Amythest? I can't tell if that's what it was meant to be or not. You did use the semicolon correctly but I don't know if that's the best puncutation here.

***
“That HURT!” Rowe wailed the next morning. He was sat on the same table in the café, complaining to the young waitress. “I was just talking to him, and then I felt a bump on my head this morning! Jeeze! I can still feel it!”

This was a big, random jump. Where I'm not sure what happened.

“I believe you deserved it.” I said lightly to him as I joined him at the table, “I never expected you to pull that one on me.”

This doesn't make sense to me. I think you might need to redo the whole opening scene.

The waitress giggled as Rowe scowled. I gave her my usual order, then shooed her away.
“I found a poster thin morning, ‘John Clever’” I placed the freshly printed poster onto the table, “he is worth about 17’000gr.”

This not thin. Your quotations, since there is no verb like said would have periods at the end. Clever would have a period behind it. Table would also and he would be capitalized either way.

Rowe seemed uninterested, “he’s cheap. Any better money bags?” the waitress returned with our orders, “we are low on money.”

Again here. Period after uninterested. He would be capitalized again. So would the and again with the period. You do that a lot after this but I'm not going to point them out.

“True, but as I’m a jeweler, being named Ami was my mother’s idea. But my father wanted me to be named after a jewel or stone. So I was called Amethyst instead. Mainly my feminine looks tack on that name.”

Is he a jeweler? I might be lost. Does the feminine looks mean he is a man?

Rowe shook his head, “so they wanted to call you Ami? But ain’t that a-“

It's because of the hyphen but the quotation marks are wrong.

Rowe frowned, dumping his muffin – or what was left of it – back down on the plate in front of him, “What in blazes tar nation is a greater mystery than you?”

I've heard what in tar nation and I've heard what in blue blazes but I've never heard both together like you have it.
Fantasy[/color]

This was okay. I think all the dialouge at the end sort of dragged it out and made it a little boring. At the same time a feel like it was necassary. Your dialouge, however, is no longer wooden. I'm still interested and now I have the Truth to wonder about too. Hopefully, you'll post chapter four soon.
Megsug