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Successful Failure



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Reviews: 5
Fri Oct 28, 2011 8:52 pm
27017296 says...



This was an SAT practice, for school. It's really short, but I was supposed to make it short. I hope you enjoy reading it. :)


There is no success like failure. It’s true. After all, what do you really learn from success? For one thing, you learn that you’re better than everybody else, who failed. What kind of a lesson is that? It just makes you proud, and ‘pride goeth before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall.’ (BibleGateway.com) I’m not saying that to succeed is to fail, or to fall. I’m saying that failure can teach you more than success can. When you fail and you know why, you’ll be sure not to make the same mistakes again. Somebody once told me that when I lose a game, I shouldn’t think of it as losing, but as learning to get better. The more I fail, the more likely I am to succeed, unless I give up. But just because failure teaches you things, it doesn’t mean you should try to fail. It means that if you do fail, it’s okay, because you learned something, and it will help you succeed in the future. There is no success like failure means that losing is learning.
Signatures are so 2011
  





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Sat Oct 29, 2011 1:49 am
crescent says...



But just because failure teaches you things, it doesn’t mean you should try to fail. It means that if you do fail, it’s okay, because you learned something, and it will help you succeed in the future.

*Add 'just' between the two words to increase fluidity.

If this is a practice for the SAT, I suggest you take out the bible verse, because I doubt you'll be able to use other sources besides what you have stuffed inside your head. Also, if you are quoting the Bible, you should include the book and verse. For my understanding of the SAT, they look for high-level vocab words. Perhaps you should try to shove a couple of those in your SAT practice essay.

For formal writing, generally people don't use conjunctions (you're, they're, we'd, he'd, I'd, etc.). You may wish to replace 'you' and 'I' with 'one'. I'm not really sure what the grading criteria is for the SAT is though, nor their expectations; this is simply what my English instructor advises me to do.

Additionally, you may wish to include the prompt to your SAT practice essay entry so reviewers will know what to look for when reviewing. You pose some valid points, but as with all literary works, there is room for improvement. Happy Writing!

-Crescent
(P.S. You should post some fictional works ;) Then I can do some more sleuthing! :D)
Please take care to use good grammar when making a post!

"grammer" 1519 matches on YWS *twitches*

Rydia is the ruler of the world. :(
  








Prometheus, thief of light, giver of light, bound by the gods, must have been a book.
— Mark Z. Danielewski, House of Leaves