Spoiler! :
Oh gosh, I look away for a minute and look at all this FABULOUS poetry that continues to pop up in this thread! I don't even know which ones to quote since I like them all.
I'm especially loving the paragraph poetry vibes.
The picture of the person you paint in poem 4 is so clear and thorough and poetic - and especially the opening line is just perfect, "he stays up til 1 just so he can watch the sky breath" the poem feels like speeding through a town where you just barely have time to take in all the buildings and people and then suddenly you've seen everything but all at once. And then the turn at the end to speaking in first person is a nice twist / perspective change too.
poem 5 is very relatable with the feeling of "looking from the outside" at all the seemingly perfect-happy couples. And the whole metaphor of poem 6 of lacking gravity / control is really well done too.
And also love your phrasing here: "a moony silhouette of nose sloping to forehead" such an interesting way to describe that, but in a good inventive way that paints a vivid picture to me. Looking forward to reading more!
I'm especially loving the paragraph poetry vibes.
The picture of the person you paint in poem 4 is so clear and thorough and poetic - and especially the opening line is just perfect, "he stays up til 1 just so he can watch the sky breath" the poem feels like speeding through a town where you just barely have time to take in all the buildings and people and then suddenly you've seen everything but all at once. And then the turn at the end to speaking in first person is a nice twist / perspective change too.
poem 5 is very relatable with the feeling of "looking from the outside" at all the seemingly perfect-happy couples. And the whole metaphor of poem 6 of lacking gravity / control is really well done too.
And also love your phrasing here: "a moony silhouette of nose sloping to forehead" such an interesting way to describe that, but in a good inventive way that paints a vivid picture to me. Looking forward to reading more!
Gender:
Points: 144000
Reviews: 1228