Young Writers Society

i thought it was very good. a little confusiong, but good...are you sure you're 11?

fairy ;-P

‘Tis one of the soldiers, a colonel, by the look of the decoration on him. On his flat-ironed coat there are many rows of shining medals and colorful ribbons, and his hat is nearly brimming with them as well.

Are you talking about a British officer? I'm not sure you'd be able to tell a Colonel by his decoration, unless your character is that way. Also, the hat was actually called a bicorne if you want to be technical (and I do, for historical accuracy). If so, medals and such wouldn't be placed upon it as it would fall off too easily, so it wasn't really done.

Otherwise, it was great!

Yessssss...

thankeee Jack!

Don't worry. I can be your official British army checker if you so need

I do.


I have the Continental army down and pat (coz they're easy, they didn't wear uniforms or decoration or anything) but this story has essentially nothing to do with them. Ho hum.

At the beginning yuo start too many paragraphs with the same word

*cough* intentional *cough cough*

Lol. If it's really that bad, just tell me and I'll fix it.

(personally, I like it, but I am biased)

I could tell it was intentional. I just didn't like it.

Reichieru you are so very honest! For the way you told it Sam, was excellent.

If you want to get to understand it better, try reading the rest of her story. Its really good Sam! I love it! Damn you for being better than me!

I like it, but I would say the same as Reichieru; I knew the 'tis's were intentional but I didn't like it. Well, I sort of liked it but not really. But it is still very good. Write more!