Young Writers Society

Very small, so not any comments on language/lexis choice.

My only problem is the beginning of the Proclamation, as it doesn't seem professional or legal enough.

Set forth by Colonel Edward Fletcher,
Of
His Majesty’s Royal Army
This 18th day of June in the year of our Lord 1777

They had a way of being long-winded and boring at this time.

Set forth by Colonel Edward Fletcher of His Majest'ys 54th Foot, under the orders of Major-General Blahblah, commander-in-chief of His Majety's Army in the American colonies, authority on behalf of His Majesty King George III.

For example. I don't know. I just think you should extend it a little. A Colonel would definitely not have enough authority to force such laws upon a town, so it would need to describe the authority above him. I think.

I like it but to short to really comment or anything. And I agree with what Jack said about the proclamation.


EDIT: Oooohhh, another girl, eh? I love it Sam, love it.

He doesn't. That's the point...lol

w00t! 54th of foot!

Even so, the proclamation doesn't sound real.

You'll find out why in a moment...