This is the very first chapter. If you'd like to read more, I'll be posting the rest in a folder dedicated to the story (if I ever find out how to do that). Please don't hesitate to tell me what you think! I really need critique--thanks!
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Jenna grabbed the brush off the vanity and started brushing her straight, bleach blonde hair. She stared in the mirror, looking herself over. The slinky black dress she wore accentuated her hips perfectly. The large silver bangles draped over her wrists jingled and jangled. The diamond studs she wore in her ears matched the beautiful diamond necklace on her neck. She brushed her bangs, and set the brush back on the vanity, looking herself over once more.
"Hey, Liz? Kelly? You guys ready yet?" Jenna called. Her friends were in the bathrooms getting ready. They came out, looking as beautiful as Jenna. Liz wore a short red dress, and Kelly wore a dark blue strapless dress. "Yeah, let's go! We're taking my car!" Liz called. "Shotgun!!" yelled Jenna. They grabbed their purses, and slammed the apartment door shut.
"Well I would walk five hundred miles, and I would walk 500 more..." The girls sang along to the song blasting from Liz's car radio. The song ended and they took a few breaths and laughed. "Hey, there it is!" Nineteen year old Kelly pointed to the large colorful lights up ahead that read RAD. RAD was the club they were going to. Liz pulled into the parking lot of Rosebud, the restaurant next to RAD. The girls opened their doors, and stepped out into the dark fresh air.
The girls linked arms. Liz, at the end, showed the guard outside the three ID cards. The big burly man, Tank was his name, quickly looked at the cards and then stared at us. He gave the cards back to Liz, and ushered us in. Inside, lights were flashing, people were dancing. Kelly jumped right into the crowd. She did her signature moves and then just started dancing like the others. Liz and Jenna pointed and laughed at their friend.
A waitress came over with a tray of martinis. Liz and Jenna grabbed one. Suddenly, Liz was literally whisked away, by a young man, around 20 years old. He grabbed her hand and spun her around. She laughed, and as she spun her martini bounced around and out of her cup! Jenna smiled and watched her friends enjoying themselves. She looked around the room and caught a glimpse of a man watching her. A woman was by his side. Once Jenna looked at them, they quickly averted their eyes and moved a little ways away.
Jenna shrugged, and held her drink with two hands. She bobbed her head to the music, tapping her fingers against the glass cup. She grabbed Kelly out from the crowd. "I'm going to the bathroom! Need to patch up some lipstick!" Jenna said above the noise. "WHAT?" Kelly yelled. "I need to patch up my LIPSTICK!" "WHAT?!" Jenna shook her head and walked to the lady’s room. She found a free mirror and stood in front of it. She fumbled through her purse, and brought up a dark red lipstick. She smeared it on, and popped her lips a few times. She smiled into the mirror, and threw the lipstick back into her purse, and walked out.
She tossed her drink in the garbage can outside the bathroom, and headed to the bar. "Hey lady, can I see some ID?" the Hispanic bartender asked in an annoying voice. "Sure." Jenna handed the woman her card. She looked it over, and then looked at Jenna. "You're only nineteen." The woman said, chewing her bubblegum. "Yes. I'm not going to drink. My God. I go to clubs, but I'm not actually going to break the law. I just want a water." Jenna sighed. Actually, the woman sighed too. She bent down, and came up again with a cup of iced water. "$2.25" Jenna reached into her purse, found her wallet and gave the bartender the money. She spun around, so her back was facing the bartender. She looked around at the people, at the lights, at everything. Something caught her eye. The man again. He was watching her.
Jenna turned away, but then immediately looked back at the man again. "It must be a coincidence. We both looked across the room at the same time. He's just looking at something else." she thought. But when she looked back again, he was heading her way. She hopped off the bar chair and started to walk away casually. He walked the way she was going, and never failed to stare at her. She hurried her pace. She found Kelly and Liz, and pulled them away. Jenna started walking, very fast to the double doors of the club. "Let's go." she whispered to them. She started running. She looked back, and the man was running, too.
She ran as fast as her thin legs could go, breathing heavily. Her friends didn't bother to ask why they were running like lab mice from a crazy scientist and a needle. All three of them pushed the doors open and raced to the car. Jenna looked back, and saw the man clearly. He stopped at the club doors. His arms were laid to his sides, his hands in fists. He didn't look intimidating. But there was something about him. His eyes. His eyes told the story only Jenna knew. "Come on, Jen." Liz gently pulled on her arm. Jenna got into the car and looked back once more. Or so she thought.
The ride home was silent. Liz pulled into the apartment parking and stopped. Jenna reached to open the door. "Stop." Liz said. Jenna retracted her arm and placed her hand on her knee. "What happened, Jen?" Jenna looked down at her hands. "Nothing. I don't want to talk about it." She opened the car door, and raced up the steps.
A few minutes later, Liz and Kelly opened the apartment door and sat on the bed next to Jenna. Kelly put her arm around her. "You okay?" Jenna looked at the two wonderful girls sitting next to her. The girls she told everything to. The girls she did everything with. The girls she could trust. "I saw it in his eyes." she whispered. Her eyes were big and red. Kelly and Liz looked at eachother.
"What is going on, Jenna? We only ask this because we care about you!" Liz said in a rather uncomfortable tone. "I said I don't want to talk about it. Please. I'm going to bed." Jenna said. She didn't even bother to change out of her party dress. She flipped over onto her side, shut the light, and fell fast asleep to the perfect nightmare.
Jenna was running. Not literally running. But running in her dreams. The man was chasing her. The man with the story in his eyes. The man with the HORROR story in his eyes! "Jenna!" he called. She never looked back. She kept running. Running until she fell into the darkness. Spinning, spinning, spinning she fell. She twisted and turned in her sleep, whimpering a bit. "Sweet dreams." the man cackled, standing above ground waving goodbye to Jenna. Suddenly Jenna popped up, breathing heavily like she did at the club. Her mind was racing. She looked towards the window, and saw them. The eyes. He was there, watching her. She screamed. But no one could hear her. She was in a silent horror movie.
Jenna didn’t know why no one could hear her. She wished they would. The man was standing there… still. She shook Liz, and she woke up, swatting Jenna.
“What is it, Jenna? What’s wrong?” she said.
Jenna couldn’t speak, so she pointed to the window. Liz stared, waiting to say what she wanted to.
“Jenna. There’s no one there.”
Jenna was dumbfounded. There was a man there. She knew there was.
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