I wrote this for a contest recommended by my friend. Sorry, it's almost finished (it finishes at 11:59 PM June 30, 2010). You can give critiques of my writing style, or "keep this in mind when writing." Or, if you wish, you can comment on the passage itself.
The stench of smoke and brimstone filled the air. The impervious Great Clown Sweater was hot and sticky, but it provided the defense from the evil Scalzorci. Buzz, the Magical Unicorn Pegasus Kitten, was in her top physical condition. It took quite a campaign to lead up to this moment. With the background music switching from dramatic to sappy, Wil recollected his adventure.
It began with a rather rainy day in early June. Wil was driving along an old, weathered road, when the rain began to intensify. Soon Wil's visibility lessened to the point where he pulled off the road to wait the rain out. The enveloping rain died down, but Wil was no longer on that old, weathered road. Instead, he was in a candy-colored world of red, green, yellow, and blue blocks about the height of his knee.
On closer inspection, the boxes were houses, inhabited by...things...similar to the Travelocity gnome. He could barely hold in his giggles when they piled out of the house and stood around him.
"Do you think you could slay the evil Scalzorci?" one of the smaller ones piped up. "He's destroying our family's grapes!"
It took some explaining, coaxing, and wine, but he did agree to save Parva, as the region was called.
Parva was a peaceful community nestled in the Bacchia Valley. Its lush hills, similar to Napa Valley on Earth, were fertile ground for the best wine grapes anyone could find. The "gnomes" ran the vineyards, and they made and sold the wine. The vineyards also attracted many tourists.
Scalzorci lived in a volcano on the northern end of the valley. Nobody knows why he chose to live there, but his presence was continually felt by the locals. One night, Scalzorci had too much of the local finest and embarrassed himself in front of his superiors. He was demoted, but his antipathy led him to viciously attack the gnomes' vineyards to displace his anger. Without the vineyards, wine could not be made, and tourism suffered with Scalzorci's attacks. Parva needed Scalzorci out of the region, or Parva would end up as dilapidated as Detroit.
Wil was told to go to the village elders to seek advice about defeating Scalzorci.
"Whaddaya want?" the leader of the elders asked in a rather irritated voice.
"I come to find the way to destroy the evil Scalzorci," explained Wil, surprised by how formal and dramatic his answer was.
"Oh, so you think you can kill him? Will you be the proverbial David against the Goliath of Scalzorci?"
A different elder spoke up. "Master, please treat the traveler with respect, not sarcasm. I believe he is chosen.”
The elders' leader was obviously agitated at this comment. "Don't you think I can tell who can kill Scalzorci?" He turned back to Wil and said, "Nice to meet you. My name is Robertson. I'll take you to see your guide for your stay here, he's just a few doors down. Eugene, come along too."
The party of three walked out to a yellow gnome-dwelling in a forest. It was neat and well-kept, and quite cozy. "Ann, are you in there?" Robertson called.
Ann stepped out. "What are you calling me for?" she asked.
Robertson explained, "You will be guiding our visitor around Parva. He is sleeping at the Tiuton, but it is your job to show him the town. Now, Eugene, what were the prophecies about Scalzorci?"
Eugene dug around in his backpack-like pouch and produced two scrolls. He began to read the first out loud.
The thing which ended many careers
Did not end your own; but Wil protect
You from harm, and many cheers
Wil come when you are correct
He then moved to the second scroll.
The Evil One
Wil cower from
What is usually considered cute
And Wil shrink away
From the horned jay
And the gentle winged brute
Wil was not quite thrilled. "Well! Those are quite ambiguous statements. Can I have those scrolls, Eugene?"
Eugene obliged and handed over the scrolls.
Wil took a quick look at the scrolls and noticed something quite peculiar: All the times the word "will" was used, it was spelled with a capital W and only one L, just like his name. Once Wil pointed this curiosity out, the group started to go on its way back to the elder’s tent.
Wil started to think. "Well, the prophecies are a good place to start. My career is as a blogger. What ended many bloggers, but not me? Y2K? Dot-com bust? No, wrong time period. And plus, what would be the physical manifestation of those abstract ideas? Ah! Yes! The clown shirt! But that was who-knows-where back on Earth? How could it help me here?"
Suddenly cheers erupted out of nowhere. The whole group looked wildly around, but saw nothing. Then Wil noticed he was wearing the Great and Infamous Clown Shirt.
"THAT is your protection from Scalzorci?" Robertson exclaimed. "That excuse-for-a-shirt should not be worn at all, much less for a magical purpose!"
"But it must be!" Eugene chimed in. "Why else would it suddenly appear on his shoulders along with inexplicable cheers? The prophecy predicts it!"
“I will admit that it is the shirt, but he should not wear it unless in battle with Scalzorci! I don’t what the public thinking he is insane!” Robertson fired back.
Wil interrupted, “Well, there is no use arguing about when to wear the shirt. I can’t get it off! Whenever I try to take it off, it disappears from my hands and pops right back on.”
Ann gave Wil the tour of the city and the rest of the day passed rather uneventfully. Wil slept at the local hotel, the Tiuton, and started out for the volcano the next morning. Along his way he came along a cave. Remembering the second, unanswered, scroll, he (walked) into the cave, wondering what it might hold. It didn’t take long for him to find out.
Wil was barely in the cave when he felt a huge, slobbery tongue lick him. He whirled around and saw a giant kitten – with a unicorn-like horn and wings – flanked by an old, white-bearded, sagely wizard.
The wizard spoke up. “Ah, Wil. You have made it this far. This is Buzz, the Magical Unicorn Pegasus Kitten. She has been trained very well. Please take care of her.”
“But who are you?” Will inquired.
“Bonos in fabulis adiuvo.” And with that cryptic remark, he disappeared. Buzz started licking Wil again.
“Let’s go get that evil Scalzorci!” Wil cheered as he climbed onto Buzz. She took to the air and headed for the volcano. Buzz hovered around the volcano until Wil spotted Scalzorci, then she swooped down and landed a distance away from Scalzorci. He did not notice them approaching until Buzz pounced.
Scalzorci rolled to Wil’s left. Buzz skidded on the solid stone ground and lunged again. Scalzorci dropped to the ground with his legs in the air. Buzz fell for the trap. Once Buzz hand landed on his legs, Scalzorci kicked Buzz off, her momentum carrying her onward. Buzz hit a rock ledge and flopped on the ground with a thud. Wil could tell she was hurt. He jumped off and faced Scalzorci alone. Wil and Scalzorci faced each other like an Old West showdown, each waiting for the other to make a move. Time seemed to slow down.
Scalzorci charged. Wil saw the determination in Scalzorci’s eyes. He shrank back in fear, and he tried to run; but, like a dream, he could not make his legs move. He fell to the ground, cowering. He waited for the inevitable blow. Suddenly, Buzz leapt up and tumbled Scalzorci to the ground. Scalzorci was pinned, and now he was the one cowering in fear. Wil stood up, but too fast. The exertion of the small face-off was enough to make him faint. He fell to the ground.
Wil woke up in a car. It was regular size. He looked around. He saw a road, trees, rain, other cars. He was back in the real world. He checked his watch. The whole adventure in Parva took less than five minutes.
Wil grinned and went back on the road, but he failed to notice a small figure in the back seat.
Gender:
Points: 1910
Reviews: 12