Spoiler! :
It was hot out here in the field. I was taking a rest break after trekking through miles and miles of grass and soggy dirt. I found it amazing that my feet could be so cool and my head so hot at the same time. I had set down my pack on the ground, remembering too late that the land was basically light swampland, so when I lifted the pack up I found it had absorbed three or four gallons of water.
But I couldn't complain, since I had a date with Lisa. My heart was spending the day soaring among the vultures high above, delighting in the sweet scent of acceptance. I wondered if there was a dead animal around that the vultures were circling. I really didn't want a bunch of dumb birds ruining my happy moment.
I slung my pack over my shoulder again, almost dislocating my entire spine with the sudden shift in weight. I told myself I was going to get buff carrying this pack. Lisa would be impressed when I came back the next day with something unique from the forest.
My goal in lugging this pack out here was to find a spot in the woods, make camp there and spend the night. Then I was supposed to find something in the forest that was unique. It wasn't to prove I was in the forest - they'd hidden a GPS in the pack for that - it was so I could remember my experience fondly via some tangible object. I wasn't allowed to bring back a sense of peace unless I stayed a few months.
I wouldn't have taken the forest challenge, but Lisa was asking for people to sign up and she'd looked very sad when everyone else said no.
So, like a fool, I said, "Hey, I'll do it."
A hundred pounds heavier and twenty miles away, I no longer felt that was one of my better decisions.
I could see the tree line now, only a quarter mile away. Sweat poured off me like tears from a mourner. The ground became slightly softer and my feet felt as though they would stick in the mud with my boots if I had to walk another step.
I vowed to throw away most of the contents of my pack as soon as I got to the trees.
After an excruciating ten minutes, I made it to the trees and laughed maniacally. I shrugged off the pack and, for good measure, all my clothes, and danced around naked in the wilderness.
I mean, who's gonna see, right?
So there I was, naked, and all of a sudden this cute little bunny rabbit hopped up and stopped about ten feet away. It rose up on its haunches and wiggled its nose at me prettily, so I immediately made that, "AWWWW!" sound.
"Oh wow," said the rabbit, "you got little chicken legs, man."
"What? No I...wait, rabbits don't talk. Did you talk?"
The rabbit leapt at me in that moment, clearing ten feet easily and aiming directly for my chest. It hit me and the force was enough to send me stumbling back. I tripped on a dip in the ground and hit the ground. My head went back and the last thing I heard before blacking out was a sickening crack.
I was in a pit when I woke up. I was still naked and my pack was gone. A rabbit was looking down at me from above. it was hard to tell it's facial expression, but it was clear from the firearm it held that escape would mean death.
I sat up and the bunny tensed. I groaned, "This can't be happening. How can you speak?"
The rabbit did not answer, and for a moment I felt a glimmer of hope that perhaps the rabbit speaking was a trick of my imagination.
Another rabbit hove into view. "Shut up, prisoner!" he snapped, "You are to be sent back to your camp at dawn tomorrow. You will be the only warning the world will receive before the rabbits take over. Consurgo leporidae!"
The guard looked stoic as ever when the other rabbit left. I tried talking to him, but he just looked at me. His gun was like a miniature version of a machine gun, which, despite the circumstances, looked incredibly cute.
I was fed lunch and dinner, both of which consisted of food from my pack. I was told after dinner that I was to appear before the council after I finished. I ate quickly, hoping desperately that all this would soon be explained.
I was thrown a rope by which I climbed out of the pit. I was then bound with it and made to hop to my destination. There were three burly rabbits guarding me and every once in awhile they would shoot me looks of pure hatred. I resolved to not provoke them, but I had a feeling they needed no provocation.
When we reached the council, I tripped and went sprawling. The rabbits laughed at me as I lay in the dirt, struggling to get up and retain some of my dignity. Considering I was still naked, it was a futile attempt.
One of the rabbits stood and addressed all of the others. He spoke of the oppression placed upon rabbits, as well as the horrid conditions in which even the pet rabbits were kept. "Now!" He shouted, raising a paw. He was clutching a small, ceremonial dagger, which added a good deal of menace to the cuteness. "Now we go forth in force to rid the world of this scourge! We will take our place in history as those who triumphed over man! We will fight! We will win! Our strength is in numbers and the numbers are on...our...side! CONSURGO LEPORIDAE! The rabbits will rise against the oppressor!"
The rabbit hopped from his place and, dagger in paw, advanced toward me. He came to my ear and whispered harshly, "Go now, scum. Warn your fellows of the coming disaster." He raised the dagger high above his head and screamed, "Consurgo leporidae, consurgo...leporidae!!!" Then he brought the dagger down on the ropes and cut me loose.
I reacted quickly, grabbing for him in a fit of desperation. He was prepared for this, however, and leapt out of the way, laughing. "Run, pitiful human. Run and prepare, for the lagomorph shall rise!"
I ran, then. I didn't care that I was naked, I just ran. I don't know how long it was 'til I had to stop and rest, but I didn't rest long before I was up and running once more. The night's cool air grabbed at me as with claws, seeking to fatigue me and halt my progress, but still I ran.
Dawn was on the horizon by the time I made it to camp. I must have looked a mess, but I did not care. Frank and Henry, the sentries, were concerned first about my physical health, then they began wondering if I had gone insane. I realized I must have seemed like it, gibbering about the rabbits attacking and whatnot. I was given a blanket, which I clung to desperately.
Lisa came to see me and tried to coax some sort of logical explanation from me, but I adamantly held to my tale. I told her everything I remembered and she patted my back with a concerned, yet disbelieving look in her eye.
I felt the wear of the ordeal settle on my shoulders and snoozed for awhile, then awoke and took a shower. Everyone treated me like a child, even my best friends. I knew, however, that they would soon know the truth.
The lagomorph would rise against us.
And we didn't stand a chance.
Gender:
Points: 3699
Reviews: 86