Young Writers Society

Italian version :

Camminando, lascia per strada cristalli di ghiaccio.
Non ha calore; non sa stare in mezzo alla gente.
Si impietrisce nella fredda anima che lo assembla,
non lasciando spazio ad un'espressione inabile ad apparire nel suo marmoreo volto.
Par emanare calore, ma là dentro, un cuore di ghiaccio, rimasto intrappolato nel suo battito rallentato,
non si dimena più.
Gli occhi perforano il vuoto, raggiungendo distanze inconcepibili ad occhio qualsiasi.
Cammina, in mezzo alla gente si fa spazio, ma ormai, è distante.
Chissà quali ghiacci sta attraversando,
chissà quali monti sta varcando privo della bombola vitale che mantiene il sangue caldo.
Non lo ascoltano,
non perviene all'occhio abbronzato di tenera vita la stagnante mente d'un anima dai colori glaciali.
Le tazze vuote che lo circondano, gli creano enorme disagio.
Quanto spaventi oh tempo.
Ti muovi silenzioso, ma lasci sempre traccia del tuo passaggio; ti fai sempre riconoscere.
Si accende un'altra carta, forse la cosa più calda che mai abbia visto.
Si sporca, si rovina, si abbandona.
Non mi senti, pensa, ma chi potrebbe rompere tale ghiaccio spesso una vita.


Tace. Con il silenzio, convive.



English version:



When he walks, he leaves ice crystals on the streets.
He has no heat; He can't be among people.
He petrifies in cold soul who assembles himself,
leaving no space for an expression unfit to appear in its marble face.
Seems to emanate heat, but there, a heart of ice, trapped in his heartbeat slowed,
no longer squirms.
The eyes pierce the void, reaching unimaginable distances to any eye.
He walks in the midst of people, seeking space, but now he is away.
Who knows what the landscape of ice that is going through,
who knows what mountains is crossing without the oxygen tank which keeps the blood warm.
They do not listen him,
the stagnant mind of a soul colored as ice is not seen by the eye full of tender life.
The empty cups around him, creating great discomfort to him.
How scared, oh time.
You move quietly, but always you leave traces of your passage, you can always recognized.
He lights another paper, perhaps the hottest thing he ever saw.
He is dirty, he is ruined, he leaves himself.
You can't feel me, he thinks, but who can break the ice thicker than a life?.


He is silent. With the silence, he is living.

Beautiful.... and now im envious i wish i knew Italian language, somehow i have a feeling that it makes much more sense and has a much deeper meaning saying it in Your language. Just one question is it a vampire or are you just describing the feeling of isolation and cold?

That was beautiful, and I admire your choice to write in Italian. It's a much more musical language than English.

What a picture you paint! It changes in my mind, flows with each line you add.

One thought:

You move quietly, but always you leave traces of your passage, you can always recognized.
He lights another paper, perhaps the hottest thing he ever saw.

You seem to change direction briefly near the end. You are speaking concerning a "He" and then you talk to "You".

Just a thought. Thanks for sharing!

-Laminated

Another great work! I just love reading the Italian! There were a few small grammar errors in the English version, but that comes when writing in a language that's not native to you. I really can't critique anything else because you're such a great writer (and way out of my league!) and I can feel the immense inspiration you put forth in your writing. I love reading your stuff because it's like reading a painting. That's the best way I know how to describe it. Keep up the phenomenal work. I hope to see more soon!

~Jess

Thanks! Very kind.
Yeah, i've chanced direction at the end and for a while, I started to speak in the first person. This was because this change improve the power of the character, as he shout out all his thoughts.

Yes! I'm sorry for the grammar mistakes. I've translated it very quickly and yeah, in the english version it isn't perfect !
I always try to express my writing as it is a painting because the paiaccuracy and the attention to details are the most important thing, for my writing.