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Young Writers Society


No Easy Love



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25 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 1465
Reviews: 25
Sun Jan 08, 2012 6:13 am
Stargirl101 says...



Nothing is ever granted to a man. Not strength,
neither the weakness of his heart. And when he thinks the
open arms of love surrounds him, It is the shadow of a cross
and when he thinks he is safe, his happiness, once crushed,
Now blooms with mysterious fervor
His life will be remarkable but raw.

Love will never be easy.

Her life is like an unarmed soldier,
they wish for a different fate.
What can they use to hide in the morning?
They found the evening no less with
Uncertainty when unarmed
Say those words to end my life and hold back your tears.

Love will never be easy.

My beautiful lover, my dearly beloved,
The tears that carry your love through me,
Make me bleed like a wounded bird
and those who watch unaware see us pass
Say again to me the words I braided through your hair
And for the look you gave me, at once I wept.

Love will never be easy.

The time to realize is now, but to live it is too late
the cries of the night are our hearts moaning in unison,
At the disparity of our world
What is needed for evil to share its tale?
What is it to regret needing to pay for its thrill
what is it to sing to the bittersweet melody of a guitar?

Love will never be easy.

There is no love that can destroy pain
There is no love that cannot be bruised
There is no love that will never fade
and although your home gives you passion
Love won’t keep the resilient from crying

Love will never be easy.
But it is our dream for it to be.
Presence is a curious thing. If you need to prove you’ve got it, probably never had it in the first place. It’s not an ostentatious, adolescent display. It should be something effortless. Somebody once said: ‘The whisper is louder than the shout.’ Well amen to that.
  





User avatar
308 Reviews



Gender: Male
Points: 25520
Reviews: 308
Sun Jan 08, 2012 10:48 am
AlfredSymon says...



Hi Stargazer! The stars are great tonight, so I'll give a Kudos Revue!

So I read this piece 'No Easy Love', and I sensed that it was a worthwhile topic to read. And it WAS. It was some kind of story but told in a very beautiful and serene way. It was some sort of complication between regret and longing. The first person needed something it doesn't want.

The theme is wonderful, I completely loved it. I also adore your sense of repetition of the line, love will never be easy. The final verse made a very satisfying finish which tide up the whole piece. Kudos to that!

How about more adjectives and less literalness? It can make your poem become more poetic and imaginative. But don't get me wrong, it is great just the way it is. But, a few changes would make it better, right? Also, the first stanza was a bit to narrative for a lyric, how 'bout some cutting-n-chopping?

I've also noticed your pattern in writing: colored and centered. It's always good for a writer to leave some sort of mark or signature in to their piece, just in case :D .

In short I really loved your work, so here: :D :D :D :) :)

Good luck writing, proud to be a reader of your work!
Al
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