Young Writers Society

You're like an an addiction to me
One I can't get rid of
Even rehab won't cure me
You've seeped deep into my skin

You're like oxygen to me
Something I can't live without
Should you go, for me
Living would be hard

Yes, I am addicted
And you are my cocaine
Everything I own is yours now
Don't leave or go away

Yes, I am addicted
Can't let go of you
You are like my sun now
My only light is you.

It becomes hard to breathe
When you are not around
The wind is gone, I'm choking
Please come back to the ground

Without you, I'm alone
Like a moon without it's planet
You are the wand, I'm the witch
I'm never gonna let you vanish

Yes, I am addicted
You're the one who means the most
Don't go away, just stay here
Hold my hand, with an oath

Yes, I am addicted
And you are my conviction
I've been wounded forever
Your voice is the only medicine

So hold on tight
Never let go
Stay with me through the fire
Hold on tight
Never let go
You are my only desire

Let me stay in your arms
Let me feel the heaven tonight
Don't set me free
Just let me be
With you I'll shine bright

Yes, I am addicted
You're the only one who matters
You're the maze I'm lost in
And the exit is gone forever

You are the air, I am the fire
Without you I can't burn
You're the passion, I'm the desire
Each is the others want

Hi! Al here for a Quick Critique! Are you high? Well, because your poem is! And it's making me crazy! Clam down, calm down. Okay, now that I'm low again, let me give you a short review.

Concept & Theme:
Yes, you put out a lot here. Four months? Wow . For sharing your experience of overcoming the blocks, you get a point. And for bringing up such an 'issue' as a subject matter, I'll give you more points. Love is a common topic to discuss in poems, druggy love is for lyrics. Who would'e thought someone can make something like this! Beautiful but dark, but this darkness isn't shown in violence or sadness but in compel and longing. Great work!

Technicalities:
Let's see here,

Yes, I am addicted
And you are my cocaine

Yes, everybody knows cocaine is addictive, but it doesn't imply that it is the only one. Here, you put up a pair-up, but it didn't come out as one. The person you are speaking to can be other drugs, alcohol or something else. A little clarity could make wonders.

The wind is gone, I'm choking
Please come back to the ground

These verses were quite cliche. Plus, the 'ground' part didn't actually make any sense since wind is not on the ground. It seems that you just put it up for rhyme

Without you, I'm alone
Like a moon without it's planet

In my opinion, this is a very awkward pair-up...

I've been wounded forever
Your voice is the only medicine

The usage of medicine is not for wounds, pal!
You did good here, but I advise you to read it repeatedly so you can see what are the confusing parts. There are no actual mistakes, just awkward phrases and confusions. Also watch your capitalization and punctuation!

Imagery & Scheme:
I love the word choice. You stayed on one theme: love and science. Not exactly science, but literal words which, although not as vivid as poetic terms, are used creatively. I think you put an inconsistent rhyming scheme though...And there is no actual imagery, can this belong to Dramatic Poetry, perhaps?

Overall:
Great work! Just a bit of tidying up and it'll be all good!

Your Quick Critic,
Al