z

Young Writers Society


16+ Language Violence

The Forsaken Race - The Hidden Truth: Chapter 22

by RavenAkuma


Warning: This work has been rated 16+ for language and violence.

Chapter 22 - The Dark Horizon

                    

                            

As the time hit midnight, the sky reflected thousands of stars, dull and bright alike, surrounding a crescent moon that gave off a soothing silvery glow. The image reflected on the seemingly endless dark waters, just beyond the pale sands of the Dead Beach. The huge cliffs' shadows engulfed half the place in darkness, leaving only the edge of the shore dim-lit.

In the one-room hovel on the beach, Kita gazed out the window in distant, troubled thought. She rubbed her leg, which was still sore from the wound she received, earlier. Seyber was kind enough to apply a tonic and bandages, which helped.

The only sound was the crash of waves, as not even seabirds were brave enough to dwell here. It was quite peaceful and soothing. Apart from minor shifts in her peripheral view, Kita hadn't experienced even one odd moment.

"It's so dark," Kita murmured. "Yet it's so pretty. If I think hard enough, I can practically see..."

She squinted her eyes to where she almost couldn't see. She began to imagine this poorly built window as the one in her bedroom, with a clear pane and the lace curtains fluttering from the breeze. When she looked outside, she could see the cobblestone road that led through Lion's Bridge. Below, there were the occasional late-night drivers and their stamping armequus. If she turned around, she would see the blue walls and old wood floor of her bedroom. Stud would be curled up in the corner, silent as a pet should be, and Mao would likely be sleeping on the floor.

Caught up in her vision, Kita hesitantly glanced over her shoulder.

However, there was nothing but the cold stone walls, warped roof, unrefined floor, and a spider the size of her fist. It felt like she was in a dungeon. As Kita looked outside again, she only saw the Dead Beach. Now she knew how the place got its name. It seemed like the cove was haunted, with how dark and silent it was, without a speck of color to break things up.

Kita sighed, "I'm getting a little homesick. As much as I'm annoyed by its residents and solutions -or lack thereof, I can't help it."

As Kita heard a faint disturbance, she snapped back to her senses, inspecting the area outside. Following the noise, she moved to the door, where she very quietly and slowly cracked the door open. Just able to see near the portal, she recognized Timbur right away, but it took her a moment to realize that Leiytning was also present. He was very easy to lose track of in the faint light.

Kita sneered to herself, "Let me guess. Timbur's mad about something. I'm shocked."

It was obvious that the apprentice was annoyed, but Leiytning remained calm in responding to him.

Kita tilted her head. "I think Leiytning's part machine. He never changes, and always looks like he's plotting something. He also looks exhausted all the same time, which may explain his behavior. I guess I could sympathize with that much."

To her surprise, Timbur snarled something, only to flinch as his master retorted harshly. Knowing his temper by now, Kita was expecting things to escalate, but Timbur just dipped his head and hesitantly retreated. Leiytning remained there for a moment, ear twitching with irritation.

While Kita was stubborn about putting her trust in an enemy leader, she couldn't help recalling the previous incident with the behemoth. She could've easily had it backward; maybe Leiytning really was just saying random things, and the fact that it came in use was coincidental. On the other hand, if she hadn't taken the advice, she would've been left without direction a likely injured or punished as a result.

Kita stood up, whispering, "Maybe I can find his real motive through conversation, or better yet, a clue that Corelia could use. After all, he'll know much more than the others do."

As Kita reached for the knob, she felt that something was off. Recalling this feeling when she first reentered the shack, she convinced herself it was nothing and ignored it. As she approached, she felt a slight pang of anxiety under the leader's scrutiny.

"What do you want?" He interrogated.

Kita took a deep breath. You can do this. He's scary, but he clearly doesn't want you dead, so he won't hurt you. Right?

"For now," Leiytning responded.

Kita froze up. "How did you hear that?"

"You do realize that was said aloud, right?" Leiytning said flatly.

Kita blushed, covering her mouth. "Oh gods, now I can't even tell when I'm doing that. Um, sorry?" She whispered, "At least I know you aren't telepathic now."

Leiytning muttered, "It's obnoxious enough just hearing Thundur, I don't want to hear everyone else's stupidity on top of it."

"Wait, what?" Asked Kita. "What does that mean?"

"Are you aware of what blood twins are?" Leiytning responded.

Kita gulped nervously. "U-Um, I think I read something about it, long ago. I didn't think it was real, though. A set of twins with one mind and spirit between them. I remember they had a few abilities because of it, but mainly telepathy with each other."

"There's your answer."

"Wow," Kita murmured. "I didn't know you two were blood twins."

"That useless fact aside, what do you want?" Leiytning interrogated.

"Oh, I don't want anything," said Kita. "I just saw Timbur run off, and you were still out here, so I was a little curious. Is there something wrong?"

"No, and it's none of your concern regardless," Leiytning said dismissively. "You're not a part of this tribe, there's no reason for you to be concerning yourself with our issues."

Kita cleared her throat awkwardly. "Right. Sorry, there's just one more thing. I wanted to thank you for the advice you gave me, earlier. It may sound crazy, but it helped a lot. I even thought it was a way of not getting killed by a behemoth."

"What, you thought I was rambling nonsense?"

Kita blinked hard. "How did you know what would happen?"

"I had already picked up on the 'plan.' The original intent was to create a similar scenario to the kumodin, but with an even larger creature, and see if it stirred an interesting reaction. A stressful situation, provided it's open-ended enough, is usually good for judging someone's character, or even manifesting a repressed trait. However, the two siblings that would -to put it lightly- rather you not be here, decided to use it to scare you into going back to Sybilius. And of course, if you refused the plan, they'd spin that into a reason to get rid of you as well. The only real way for it to have ended well, at that point, was for you to follow Thundur's orders."

"Why would they do that? I've been here for almost two weeks, I thought they would have eased up by now."

"Truth be told, you shouldn't be surprised to find Thundur trying to pull some elaborate trick. As for what they're trying to do, it's obvious and I just said it. They want you out of here. They really want you dead, but they're trying to work within the current restrictions."

Kita clenched her fist. "What a cruel trick. Thank you, but can you please be honest? I can see that they want me dead, but do you? What about the others?"

"Currently, I see more use in keeping you alive, but that is subject to change."

Kita gulped nervously.

Leiytning continued, "Seyber doesn't. As for Scorch, Zin, and Jem, don't worry about having expectations for them. They're morons, and they mostly follow whoever they're working with. If Seyber's around, they'll probably be nicer. If Timbur's around, they'll be more standoffish."

"Good to know," Kita murmured. "What do I have to do to persuade Timbur and Thundur, though? Those jerks have been-"

"Watch it," Leiytning spat. "I may have helped you get this far, but I won't tolerate slander."

Kita flinched. "S-Sorry, I didn't mean it. I was just frustrated. I don't like always being targeted."

Leiytning sneered, "Get used to it, at least while you're here. Word of advice, it won't get any better if you try to run back to Corelia."

Kita seemed confused, unsure of how to respond. She knew that when it came to this subject, the wrong words, or even the wrong expression and body language, could ruin everything.

Leiynting sounded cynical. "You said it, yourself, or at least heavily implied it. You only want us to help your illness, yes? Then you'll return to Sybilius when you're done. Now, I'm not dumb enough to think you're so annoyed by other sylphs that you'll go quietly back to whatever hovel you hail from. Whatever you pick up, I know it's going to reach her somehow. Especially since we already confirmed you have access to the palace, so I also know the commoner card won't apply."

"Hm..." Kita shifted uncomfortably. "If that's what you think, then why keep me around?"

"I'm already used to it. As you've surely heard, Kodin was doing the same thing with even less subtlety. All of us were driven to kill him, but seeing how desperate he was for answers, I realized it wouldn't be hard to break the habit. Sure enough, we soon severed his ties to Sybilius, and knowing what to expect made Thundur more confident -and by extension, less hostile. You come with more complications, though."

Kita felt goosebumps break out on her skin. "Can I ask you one more thing?"

"Did I kill him?" Leiytning said with an eerily receptive tone.

Hearing the question aloud, Kita was unable to respond. She felt as if something was caught in her throat. However, the answer provided just a bit of relief.

"No. We didn't, nor do we know who did. Though he was found in the Blood Stream, there was no way to prove that one of us was responsible. 'Us' being a Zyrean or someone tied to Corelia."

Kita cringed as the words slipped out, "Not even Timbur?"

Leiytning seemed annoyed by that. "No."

"Right, sorry," Kita murmured.

Almost carelessly, Leiytning continued, "It was not only manipulation that drove Kodin to our side, of course. He had an interest in researching the world, which is much different than Sybilius poses it to be, and he showed interest in the war. Not its current nature, but its origins."

"I can trust you on that much, right?" Kita murmured. "You must've been there for most of it."

"Hey, how old do you think I am?" Leiytning retorted.

Kita laughed nervously, "Sorry. Maybe Kodin and I are linked in that one bad way, and maybe I do still have some connection to Sybilius, but it doesn't change my current goal. You can keep all the information you want, when it comes to the war. I just want to know what's wrong with me."

"At this point, I want to know as well. However, I fail to see the desperation you were talking about, that would lead you to ask us."

Kita shrugged her shoulders. "I have to admit, in these recent days, I've noticed that I'm feeling a little better. I still can't sleep too long, but it's more than what I got at home. Likewise, I still see some things here and there, especially at night. However, it's not nearly as bad..."

Trailing off, she looked at the emblem -the portal in the sand. She kept her eyes glued to it, taking in every piece. The star, the flame-like shapes, and the ring enclosing them. The longer she stared, the more she could see it started to blur, which quickly turned into twitching.

Just when she thought she was okay, her vision went black, and she saw again; the horrible black eye with a piercing white ring, boring into her.

Kita flinched and stepped back. Just as fast as it appeared, the vision ended.

"Much better," Leiytning said sarcastically.

Kita sighed, "At least it was over quickly, and it didn't get any worse than seeing an eyeball."

She could tell Leiytning was confused by that, but instead of explaining, she kept her head down and took a moment to think.

She absently spoke, "The point being, overall, the problem's better but still here. I just don't understand; it's not just sickness, it's like something is taunting me, pulling me around as if I'm just a puppet. It makes me act differently, it meddles with all my senses, it makes me do things I would've never considered doing, and it changes my entire outlook. I hate it..." She shook her head. "I'm sorry, I probably sound crazy."

Meanwhile, as Kita shunned herself, Leiytning was actually thinking over many possibilities that, despite being crazy, were surely realistic.

Unfortunately, as a response, something sounded from the depths of his own skull. This was not Thundur, though. It was a dark and menacing voice that almost made his ears bleed, and was laced with tones a sadist would have. An eerie red haze bordered his vision.

"'Stop tormenting yourself with this confusion, stop catering to your enemy. Break her! Tear her apart, piece by piece!'"

Leiytning restrained an annoyed sneer, thinking to himself, The thought of sympathizing with a sylph is as difficult as I thought, but the hypocrisy of looking down on her for experiencing anything beyond the limit of sanity...

Kita tilted her head. "Do you understand?"

Leiytning's ear twitched. "More than you think."

"Do you have experience with this?" Kita quickly asked.

"I won't say no," Leiytning responded. "That being said, none of us know what 'this' is."

"Either way, you must have some ideas, right?" Asked Kita. "Even if they turn out wrong, I'd like to know them. Please?"

On Leiytning's end, the same dark voice interfered, annoyingly drowning out any other noise.

"'Do not start acting as if you are above it. We both know, she has not witnessed even a fraction of the true horror you are capable of. Look at this scrap, exposing her vulnerability. Her weakness. Do you not still feel the instinct, in your long-repressed demonic nature, to make her suffer?'"

Ignoring it, Leiytning continued, "It could very well be magic-based, spirit-based, or even pure madness. None of us can tell just by observing your random breakdowns, though the key to the answer is likely in your head already."

Kita looked down, clenching her fists. "I was afraid of that. I've already been thinking about this for so long; if the answer's in my head, it must be so buried that there's no possible way for me to find it."

"That's all I can say. We can assist, as you've assumed, but it will still require work on your end. I feel like I shouldn't have to say this, but demons are not miracle workers."

"You said you may have some experience," Kita remarked. "What have you seen before?"

Leiytning's eye narrowed. "That much is none of your concern, and if there are connections to be drawn, I'll be the one to make them."

Meanwhile, on Kita's end, she felt irritated about the way she was being talked to, but something else was in the mix as well. She felt a new question, burning in the front of her mind. She felt as though she had the answer, but still, something was pushing her to ask.

Likely noticing her awkward body language, Leiytning rolled his eye. "What, now?"

Kita took a deep breath. "When I ask this, it's going to sound stupid, so I want to clarify something else, first. I can understand your hate for sylph soldiers and the Erxinas; I don't have to be one of you to see that they've done a lot of damage to your tribe. Needless to say, I'm a poor girl, originally from northern Sybilius. I'm literally, practically, socially, and any other way you can think of -I'm as far from you and that caste as possible. That being said..." She hesitated. "Why do you all hate me so much?"

Kita noticed him go silent, though she saw nothing to hint at an answer. Both his expression and body language were as blunt, cold, and emotionless as they always were. However, the silence did seem odd.

She barely heard his response. "Guilt by association, as Thundur said."

"That's the point, though," Kita replied. "I'm not associated with anyone that has done harm. Unless you want to believe I'm still going to take this to Corelia when everything's said and done, but remove all of that from the equation for just a minute. Why-"

"Don't tell me who to hate," Leiytning suddenly growled.

Seeing aggression from him, something she just now realized was rare, Kita felt herself go pale and shudder. She could've sworn her heart froze for a moment. She remained still and silent, trying to think of what to do.

"Since you clearly can't get the subject of Sybilius out of your head, we ought to settle this now..." Leiytning regained his simple blunt tone. "Consider this, now that you have a slightly better grasp of what things are like out here. You may return to Sybilius, but I will not tell you anything more than we have already. As you first assumed, you'll be safer over there, but you'll remain stupid. Corelia is determined to keep anything involving us repressed, and another issue you might've already faced is that most of the information is skewed anyway."

Kita crossed her arms. "I didn't think about that."

"Right now, you aren't a liability; if you were to return, there would be nothing you could do with the information you've collected. Maybe frighten your neighbors, if they don't think you're insane first. However, a deeper exploration of your illness, its origins, and either's connection to this tribe may change that, and that is where we run into a problem."

"Right," Kita murmured.

"There is no middle ground between our tribes. You may think you've broken the system and formed a new category, but you would be false. You're either a loyal sylph, or a disloyal sylph. An affiliate of ours, or a pest. That doesn't mean you have to take arms with anyone, but it does mean that we need more than a story. Just like Kodin, it's them or us, and you ought to make your choice sooner rather than later. Remain indecisive, and you won't like the consequences."

Kita became even less confident, biting her tongue. With that proposal, it was like she really was staring down the crossroads, with only two ways to go. No more time to stand around, and no alternative route. It lasted a couple of minutes before she finally gained the nerve to speak.

"I don't know," she almost whispered. "What should I do?"

"I'm not going to tell you," Leiytning replied.

Kita sighed again, uneasily looking over the dark horizon. It was like one dark cloud had started a raging storm in her mind. It gave her a churning feeling in her stomach. Her home, and loyalty to Corelia, used to mean everything. However, the concept of knowing the truth -and the cure- baffled her. What little that was left in her mind became a scattered puzzle; the voice's warning, her unorthodox actions, the advice she'd received, and now it all came down to this. The hidden truth behind what fueled the chaos.

Eventually, though, a decision began to form in her mind.

I know that I need to stay for a little longer. I have to know what they know. Can I actually betray Sybilius, though? What if I can make contact with Corelia after all? Then I may be able to get both after all.

Bored of waiting around, Leiytning was already heading off. "If you leave, just don't forget your rat. That thing is annoying."

Kita's heart skipped a beat, and she couldn't help the sudden gasp.


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Stickied -- Mon Jan 29, 2024 9:41 pm
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RavenAkuma says...



I hope you enjoyed this bonus chapter! I decided to release it early since the last one was a little slower/shorter -and this and the following are some of my personal favorites, so I got impatient and wanted to share, lol.

Anyway, have a great day or night! :)




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Fri Apr 26, 2024 4:45 am
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dragonight9 wrote a review...



I'm still working on my reviewing format but I hope you enjoy!

That upon which my dragon's eye fixed

I really love the setting you set up and the tinge of homesickness at the start. Though I wonder why she only remembered the good things. (I guess homesickness will do that to you though).

I also like how we get to see more of the relationship between Timbur and Leiytning.

Maybe I can find his real motive through conversation, or better yet, a clue that Corelia could use. After all, he'll know much more than the others do.

I really thought she wasn't working for Corelia but this and sending that message to her is convincing me otherwise.

Ohhh. I thought Leiytning would have been a lot more careful about revealing things like his blood twin powers or what happened with the behemoth and Kodin. (Interesting note about traits being unlocked there).

Unfortunately, as a response, something sounded from the depths of his own skull. This was not Thundur, though. It was a dark and menacing voice that almost made his ears bleed, and was laced with tones a sadist would have.

Oooh! What is this?! A split personality perhaps? Maybe a for more dangerous side that is the reason for his reputation? I'm so excited to find out.

I thought Kita would have realised by now that it is hatred of race not individual. But perhaps there is more to it than that.

I wonder what will happen when Kita does make her choice of who to follow. And what happened to Stud?! I thought he made it safely?

Some loose scales
The huge cliffs' shadows engulfed half the place in darkness, leaving only the edge of the shore dim-lit.

I wasn't sure why you didn't simply say "dimly lit" at the end here. I still understood the picture but it made me pause. (rest of the description was great though)

As much as I'm annoyed by its residents and solutions -or lack thereof, I can't help it.

I haven't seen this grammar before in this "-or lack thereof," line. It feels like there should either be a comma at the start or a period at the end. But my grammar isn't the best so take that with a grain of salt.

He also looks exhausted all [at] the same time, which may explain his behavior. I guess I could sympathize with [him] that much.

I think you missed the 'at' here. You could also add the 'him' but it depends on whether she is sympathizing with the trait of being exhausted or Leiytning himself.

On the other hand, if she hadn't taken the advice, she would've been left without direction [and] likely [ended up/would have ended up] injured or punished as a result.

I think you meant to put the 'and' there but the rest is just a suggestion for how to improve the sentence. Totally up to you.


As mighty wing soar overall

What a great chapter!
We learn more about the internal struggle between Kita's loyalty to Corelia and her desire to understand her affliction.

It was also nice to see more of Leiytning's character and struggles. He is clearly very good at controlling himself even though it is difficult to do so. Though I'm surprised at how little he cared about the idea of Kita returning to Corelia.

I also loved that cliffhanger. Great job making me question what happened with Stud.

Final wisdom of the scaled one

There is so much of this world yet to discover and I look forward to catching up on it.

May blazing dragon-fire light your path and ignite the flames of your inspiration.




RavenAkuma says...


Welcome back! Thanks for catching those botched sentences, I really need to be more careful in proofreading (and proofreading edits) XD There is an explanation for Stud in the next chapter as well (they were originally all one chapter, but it was a HUUUGE chapter so I split it).

Thanks for your review, much appreciated! :D



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Mon Mar 04, 2024 6:19 pm
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keeperofgaming wrote a review...



No Format because I'm going to be going full Book Theory Mode

Kita is most definitely a half demon. As I said before, the Conscience could be her demonic nature, but now that its revealed that Leiytning has the same thing. His is defined as his demonic nature, so hers is hers.

Her violet eyes come from her demonic nature, as well as her determination.

Also, I just realized it during writing this, but she is fully obedient to Leiytning, even if neither realized it. He just said, listen to your leaders, then she followed Thundur's plan. Thundur is also limited to listen, with negotiation as they are blood twins, but people like Timber and Seyber listen without much question.

The only reason she is able to resist the demon king's command at all is her Sylph heritage, diluting the command.

She also, while homesick, feels somewhat at home there, given her decreased episodes.

All in all, this just made me think, even more so, that she is half Zyrean and either Thundur or Leiytning's daughter.

Tip- For thinking use '' instead of "" to better differentiate thought and speech.




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PKMichelle wrote a review...



Hello friend!
It's me again, this time much less tired and much more focused, to review this wonderful chapter!


Per my interpretation, this was, yet again, another awesome chapter! I enjoyed it very much, and I loved all of the new information that was introduced!

Kita is in her little hut on the Dead Beach, taking everything in and reminiscing about home, when Timbur and Leiytning showed up. Quickly, Timbur leaves with his head down, and only Leiytning is left. This prompts Kita to go out and ask some of her burning questions. Leiytning is annoyed at first and snaps several times throughout the conversation, but eventually settles into it. He leaves after telling her she has to pick between them and Sybilius, leaving Kita conflicted.

This was a fantastic chapter, and I enjoyed it greatly!


If I could offer any sort of advice, I wouldn't! Like multiple chapters I've read so far, I couldn't find anything wrong! You did an outstanding job with this chapter!

I would like to say that I learned a few new words reading this, which isn't a bad thing. It's actually an amazing thing, and I appreciate it greatly!


If I had to pick my favorite part, it would all have to be related to Leiytning. He's such an interesting character, and I love when a chapter focuses a lot on him!

The first thing related to Leiytning that stood out to me happened when Kita and Leiytning began talking and the conversation veered towards Thundur. You said,

Leiytning muttered, "It's obnoxious enough just hearing Thundur, I don't want to hear everyone else's stupidity on top of it."


First of all, I love the sibling fueds! Second of all, I found it really quite funny how he blatantly calls his sister stupid, just for him to show that he cares about his siblings very much. Just a few paragraphs later, the text reads,

"Good to know," Kita murmured. "What do I have to do to persuade Timbur and Thundur, though? Those jerks have been-"

"Watch it," Leiytning spat. "I may have helped you get this far, but I won't tolerate slander."


He's defending the people he just belittled, which is very on brand for siblings, so kudos to you for that! This also showed how, even though Leiytning is really big and scary, little things can still get under his skin, like someone calling his siblings jerks. It shows the depth of his character, and I liked it very much!

Another thing that I really enjoyed that relates back to Leiytning occurred when Kita was telling Leiytning about her hallucinations and what they cause for her. You said,

Leiytning restrained an annoyed sneer, thinking to himself, The thought of sympathizing with a sylph is as difficult as I thought, but the hypocrisy of looking down on her for experiencing anything beyond the limit of sanity...


This showed that in some way Leiytning has experienced something "beyond the limit of sanity," which is quite interesting, and I definitely look forward to hopefully finding out what that is. This also showed that even though he's a fairly murderous demon, he still has enough morals to not be a hypocrite, which kind of makes him seem better in a way, which I thought was really neat!

The final thing that really caught my eye in regards to Leiytning came when Kita was questioning why Leiytning hated her. You said,

Seeing aggression from him, something she just now realized was rare...


This very little quote shows just how calm and docile he is, despite what Zyreans have to deal with and the reputation they have. It once again makes him seem a lot better and a lot more trustworthy, even though he probably isn't that way. So good job with writing this character!

Honorable mention:

The hidden truth behind what fueled the chaos.


I absolutely love it when titles are actually in the story!!!!


Overall, this was awesome! You've done a stellar job with devoloping characters, and I thought this was really nice! I had a lot of fun reading, and I definitely look forward to more!

Thank you for taking the time to write and post this, and I hope this review is of some use to you!


Goodbye for now! I hope you have a magnificent day (or night) wherever you are!




RavenAkuma says...


I'm glad you enjoyed! Thanks for another great review, much appreciated! :)




Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that.
— Martin Luther King Jr.