Young Writers Society

hello ;D Tambo here coming in for a short review on this poem.
Let’s just get straight into it!
You really know to make someone genuinely feel upset with your writing. The only mistake in this poem was that with the word soilder you actually spell it soldier, other than that the poem was great! I felt sorry and proud for the mother at the same time. I loved how the young soldier sacrificed himself, there is always a movie where the main character dies to save others. I cried in Armageddon! 😅
Overall if this work would be put on my recommended page, I wouldn’t be surprised!
Bye! I hope you have a great rest of the day or night (wherever you are).
Sincerely, Tambo

Hi names 22Midnight
i'm here to read your writing.

what a lovely start to this but then so sad at the end, it really got me feeling for the mother who lost her child because of war.

this did get me thinking about all the things going on nowadays with those out there sacrificing themselves for others like this.

this sounds like a very brave kid who marched out to battle when he was only a teen and didn't make it out.

it's nice to see how much his mother loved him and how thankful she is for his sacrifice.

also only mistake with spelling that I noticed is soilder you actually spell it soldier, since this isn't your first language and the first work you posted you did a brilliant job!

okay that's all from me see ya!

Hi there Akizx! I'm Orabella, here with a quick review.

Welcome to YWS! Hope you like it here. ^^ If you need anything, please don't hesitate to reach out to me or another active moderator. We'd love to help, even if it's just a simple question!

I love this poem so much! The sadness behind it is beautiful, and the end kind of made me want to cry. I can't tell you which line is my favorite, because pretty much half of them share that title, but I can say your lines were very powerful, each in their own way, which I thought was really cool.

Oh, so English isn't your first language? This work is amazing; I would've assumed a native English speaker had written it. There's one thing I noticed, though: I think you spelled "soilder" wrong. I believe it's spelled "soldier" (the i comes after the d). Other than that, everything looks fine, or at least nothing noticeable!

This kind of reminds me of a song from a show I like; it's a man singing about his "brave soldier boy" that died, although I feel like this poem is a little more personable. We can see it from the parent's eyes and what it was like to lose their child in exchange for freedom. This ends it on a very bittersweet note; on one hand, they are free, but on the other, they lost their child in the process. Which is worse?

I also love the connection between these lines:

Kissing him goodnight, hoping his future would come through being great like he is

My little soilder may be dead

But thanks to him we are free again

Hey there! I'm Dani and I'm here to leave a quick review. I had to read this piece a few times to really understand it.

Lines to remember: The repetition in these two lines really drives your point home.

Praying everynight, everyday and every noon to see him again

Going everynight, everyday and every noon to his grave

Author note:
Hello^^ this is my first time publishung my work...hope you like it! Feel free to correct me and give me tips!( btw!! English is not my first languange so Im sorry for possible spelling and grammar mistakes!!)