Young Writers Society

Scream

It’s knowing that nothing good
Could come from the cheerleader opening the closet,
But watching anyway.
The feeling so instinctive -
Your body warned you.
The goosebumps and hair-raising
That makes you swear someone is watching you.

It’s the uncertainty
Of the darkness;
The almost too quiet
When you’re alone in the basement.
The curiosity, the God complex, the innocence of believing
That we will always be safe.
The not knowing what makes
Things go bump in the night.

It’s knowing all too well
The evil
Of humanity.
The lack of conscience,
The pleasure of pain, control, revenge, fear.

It’s the moment
That you sit straight up,
Cold sweat, heart palpitating,
Awoken from a nightmare that is just possible enough.
And much too clear in your mind
I don’t know about you
But I sleep with one eye open.

This was fairly good it reminded me of goosebumps a bit, but still fairly good in its own way. I could say you cn turn this into a story, maybe a murder mystery? It's possible once you put your mind to it. But I still say it's fairly good, it could be legthed a bit more than just this and I've always (in my opinion) enjoyed rhymes in these kind of poetry; it gives it a bit more of a creepy feeling in my opinion. but all and all I give this a four out of five.

Your Reviewer-
MasterLHeart.

Hi Amy

I loved this poem. It was really creepy and spooky. I loved your last two lines because it summed up the whole poem really well.

amygabb wrote:I don’t know about you
But I sleep with one eye open.

I don't have much criticism on this poem all I can say is that it's great!

Deanie x