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Young Writers Society


Tortured Soul Asylum {Act 1, Scene 4}



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Tue Jun 15, 2010 4:40 am
x3CoFx3 says...



The first part of my play is here http://www.youngwriterssociety.com/post721714.html#p721714
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[Scene flashes back with Helena's parents talking to her psychiatrist.]

MRS. TAYLOR: Yes, we know who it was that killed her sister, Kristy. It was Helena's fourth grade teacher.
MR. TAYLOR: The police have known ever since it happened, and have been searching for him.
PSYCHIATRIST: And still no sign of him?
MRS. TAYLOR: Not a trace!
PSYCHIATRIST: But you know why he was after Helena?
MRS. TAYLOR: He was not stable. For all we know, he was highly delusional.
MR. TAYLOR: We know that he obsessed over Helena, and thought disgusting things about her. We found a disturbing note in her room that he had written. He even called her the Anti-Christ!
PSYCHIATRIST: Did Helena know about this?
MRS. TAYLOR: Oh, of course she did. But she never told us before Kristy died. She was afraid to let us know because she thought she did something wrong to make him act like that.
PSYCHIATRIST: Oh, that makes sense... How is she now?
MRS. TAYLOR: Not any better. She's still talking to herself, and seems to be as unfeeling as a stone.
PSYCHIATRIST: Well, keep her on the medication and anti-depressants; tell me if things get worse. I'll be seeing you and her next week on Tuesday.

[Still in the flashback, two weeks later, in Helena's fifth grade class room.]

SUBSTITUTE TEACHER: Get started on this assignment on the board now, everyone. Sits down behind desk.

[Helena comes back in the room from the bathroom, with blood dripping from her neck.]

STUDENT#1: Woah! The freak is bleeding, look!
SUBSTITUTE TEACHER: Oh my god! What did you do to your neck? I have to call 9-1-1!
HELENA: I'm a demon. Stop looking at me! You know how much they can't stand it.
SUBSTITUTE TEACHER: Hurriedly puts a bandage over Helena's neck wounds. Come on! We're going to the office; the paramedics will be here soon.
STUDENT#2: Don't bleed to death! Laughs.

[All the students scream and laugh and point at Helena as she is led off stage.]

HELENA: Heard off stage. No! Don't take me over there! That's where he is!

[Scene goes back to present day, in Helena's and Sam's cell.]

SAM: You okay?
HELENA: I don't care. I'm just so sick of hearing you all argue at those stupid therapy sessions. Scratches pictures into the wall with her nails.
SAM: But they're asking for it! Talking to my mother like that, they ought to be ashamed.
HELENA: Oh, come on, Sam; you know your mother is not here.
SAM: Pretends not to have heard her. I just want to get out of here. I remember when I was living with my family, if only I hadn't tried to slit my wrists... Then my mother wouldn't have put me in here. Ever since, I've been trying to please her, so that she might take me back home.
HELENA: And I just want to find that damned James Harry, who murdered my sister. If I ever do, I will rip his heart out, and make him eat it! Scratches more forcefully into the wall.
SAM: Lays down on her cot, staring at the white empty ceiling.
HELENA: Sam.
SAM: Hmm?
HELENA: Did you ever wonder if he was right here, in this institute?! He could be in Ward C right now! We should go and find him, then give him a taste of what he deserves.
SAM: Wow, that's a great idea! Like we even have a way to get to Ward C...
HELENA: I'll find a way, I will... I promise. I swear I will, Kristy.
SAM: Mother, I'm sorry I was never good enough for you. I'm trying to be better now, though! Soon enough you'll have to take me back home! Oh, I can't wait to see Lizzie again, and Amber and Chase! It's been so long... Cries silently.
HELENA: Tomorrow, we'll find a way to sneak into Ward C. We'll find Mr. Harry, and kill him. Smiles demonically, and falls asleep.
You've never had to crawl, you've never had to see,
what it feels like to be so trapped underneath

the weight of someone's world, comes crashing down on me

I was longing to be free, I put the bullet in you and me

This is my farewell to you and I,
this will all end in tragedy
  





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556 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 37146
Reviews: 556
Thu Jun 17, 2010 10:53 pm
ziggiefred says...



Hello there
I thought I would do the honors.
Anyway, I really liked this a lot. I could clearly see your talent as a writer as I read this. Now I don't really review scripts nor have I attempted to write a proper play but I have read them before and this was really good. The story is also gripping. There are no spelling errors so there is nothing I can correct, I thought the grammar and the stage directions were perfect. Good job.
Ziggie
The best is what you make it!

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Excuse me I have never *lied* about a character I just don't tell the truth
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