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Mutts - Green



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Fri Feb 29, 2008 9:55 pm
GryphonFledgling says...



12/17/07

015 – Green

Everything was green through their goggles, even blood. Thompson had been shot and he was bleeding on the sand. The squad had found a nest of Mutts. So had another squad. Thompson had been caught in the crossfire.

The medic was pounding on Thompson’s chest and breathing into his mouth, trying to drive life back into him. But Thompson’s life slowly ebbed away until he lay cold and dead on the desert floor, along with the entire group of Mutts. One of the soldiers kicked at one, a female.

“It’s creepy how much they look like us,” he commented, peering down at the Mutt’s face.

Everyone ignored him. Mutts may have looked human, but they were anything but human. They were monsters, modern-day Frankensteins, and they were loose in the world.
Last edited by GryphonFledgling on Wed May 28, 2008 11:15 pm, edited 1 time in total.
I am reminded of the babe by you.
  





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237 Reviews



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Fri Feb 29, 2008 10:12 pm
Teh Wozzinator says...



Gryph!! It took you long enough! I've been waiting for forever for this to come out! :D

Once again, it was short, and I honestly don't have any edits. I liked your "green" thing, it was kind of funny.

I thought that this was really good. I can't believe how you came up with such a good, original story. Why can't I do it??? XD

I can't wait to read more...

Teh Wozzinator
Go K-State for North Division!!
  





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241 Reviews



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Sat Mar 01, 2008 1:39 am
lyrical_sunshine says...



*drools all over Gryphon's beautiful stories*

Oh WOW! I'm so glad I discovered these! I just read all twelve in like twenty minutes. I'm sorry I didn't critique any of them, I'm too lazy for that lol. But I'll give you a critique now. :D


I love, love, love, LOVE your idea of stringing together several separate but related stories. Very unique, incredibly ambitious. It's the kind of stuff that is published and becomes a best seller just because it's so different and awesome. Seriously.

I love that the Mutts are basically werewolves, but you don't think of them as werewolves.

The "articles" were awesome.

Be sure to watch your spelling. Sometimes you switch words... like, I think I saw "hears" when it was supposed to be "ears."

Mostly, however, you have great grammar and beautiful description that has just enough detail without infodumping. Great, great job. I look forward to more.


~Queen Sunny I
“We’re still here,” he says, his voice cold, his hands shaking. “We know how to be invisible, how to play dead. But at the end of the day, we are still here.” ~Dax

Teacher: "What do we do with adjectives in Spanish?"
S: "We eat them!"
  





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Fri Mar 07, 2008 8:00 am
Caligula's Launderette says...



Hey, hon. Here we go again.

:D

Ta,
Cal.

Image
Fraser: Stop stealing the blanket.
[Diefenbaker whines]
Fraser: You're an Arctic Wolf, for God's sake.
(Due South)

Hatter: Do I need a reason to help a pretty girl in a very wet dress? (Alice)

Got YWS?
  








If you can't describe what you are doing as a process, you don't know what you're doing.
— W. Edwards Deming