Young Writers Society

I was walkin' barefoot along the short, green grass, that tickled my feet. It was a nice summer day, I would say about 25 degrees. The sun beamed down upon my olive skin; it reflected off my brown, silky hair and it seemed to make everything else look so much brighter. I was nearly there now, I came closer and closer to my favourite Oak tree.
It was a pretty little sight, where I came to think; where I came write songs. There was a little stream that flowed next to the tree, fresh water and plenty of fish in it. It seems like a perfect romantic spot, but I was the only one who knew about it. At least i thought i was. It's where I came to think, when my Mother and I had had arguements, or when I was upset about boys. Today however was neither, I just wanted to sit here and isolate myself from everyone else.
I was lying down, under my tree, the sun beaming upon me. I was just listening to the birds singing, the river, the noise of the woodpecker on the tree. Then there was a noise I wasn't used to, that i heard. It was people speaking. I quickly got up and ran behind the massive trunk of the Oak tree. My heart was beating uncontrollably. The fear of people being here, i don't usually speak to that many people. I'm more of a nature person.
I peeked around the tree, they looked roughly eighteen-ish. The one had gorgeous blond hair, and he was pretty tall. The other had dark brown hair and was slightly shorter than the one with the brown hair. It looked like they was goin' for a dip in the stream, but no instead they started singing. It was a song I knew very well, and I was suprised that they were singing it, but it was Taylor Swift -Speak Now. I never knew boys sang girls songs. I listened in, they were pretty good, until I realised they weren't singing anymore. They had stopped; it was just me singing.
I peeked behind the tree, they were still there. I could see them looking around, wondering where the noise had came from. I took a step forward, only slightly. I didn't realise there was a step. I lost my balance,screamed and fell over. Face into a bush. Guarenteed they would have seen me now.

I thought that was awesome! It has a great attention grabber, and was interesting the whole way through. Though in one part "It looked like they was goin' for a dip in the stream" Unless you were going for an old-fashioned way of talking it should be "It looked like they were goin' for a dip in the stream" Other than that I think it was awesome!