Spoiler! :
haha, Sorry.2. Ends
February 2003
“James?” Abigail said, halting in shock as she exited the 23rd Precinct building after having closed an especially trying case. “What are you doing here?”
“You…forgot,” James answered, not dejected but a little surprised.
Abigail stood dumbly before her mind could catch up with the situation and conjure up words. “Shoot, James I am so sorry. I...”
She padded cautiously over to where her boyfriend was leaned stiffly against his ’98 Harley Sportster. Tonight was supposed to be the night that he took her out on it. She had never been on a motorcycle before, and he wanted her to feel the thrill.
“We… we just had a long day, and it kind of slipped my mind, and…”
“No,” James interjected, catching Abigail by the hips and spreading his legs for her to step between them. His firm grip assured her that he was upset, but not so much so that this would be an issue.
“No?”
“Was it a tough case?”
“What? Uh, what does that have to do with anything?” Abigail looked down at her hands that played absently with the zipper of his leather jacket. His stare was stern and unwavering, but something in his demeanor spoke softer.
“And did you close it today?”
“Yeah. Caught the guy. Chase and all.” Abigail finally braved a glance, and oddly enough, James was grinning at her. “What?”
“Nothin’. You just had a hard day, and so you get a pass. Come on,” he said, tugging at one of her hands that still held his jacket zipper.
“A pass?”
“Yes, a pass. You know, like in grade school… they give homework passes as a prize for kids who work hard and earn it? They get to skip a homework assignment or something if they use the special pass? Well, you worked hard. You’ve earned it.”
James grinned with his words and sounded as though he was explaining this to a three-year-old. Abigail honestly wanted to punch him for it.
“I am not a little kid, ya know,” she said instead, the bridge of her nose slightly scrunching as it usually did when she was irritated.
James chuckled. “You know what? You need to relax. I just meant, don’t worry about it. I just wanna have my time with you. I haven’t seen you in almost a week, and I wanna celebrate.”
“You wanna celebrate the fact that you haven’t seen me in a week?” Abigail said incredulously. She didn’t mean it that way, but it was fun watching him go momentarily uneasy at her misuse of words and dry intonation.
“The case! Celebrate the case. Come on, you know what I meant.”
James shook his head as he revved the engine of his bike and grabbed for Abigail’s hand. She moved it away though, and when he leaned over, he nearly fell off the bike and into her stomach. She couldn’t help but crack a smile and laugh.
“On second thought, clumsy, I don’t know if I want my first motorcycle ride to be with someone who could potentially get me into an accident,” Abigail teased.
“Oh, shut up. Just get on, will ‘ya?”
Abigail smiled as she got on behind him.
“Don’t forget this,” James said, first handing her a black helmet with a silver inscription on it before putting on his own of similar decor.
“Really?” Abigail questioned, staring at his side profile disbelievingly after having read the words on both helmets.
“What?” James’s smile was devilish. “We are a great pair,” he finished, adding a wink.
“I am so not wearing this!” She looked again at the words on their helmets. “Catwoman and Batman? Why are you such a dork?”
James simply grinned at her and nudged the helmet with his elbow, implying for her to put it on anyways.
As she did so, she added good-humoredly, “I’m a cop, and you thought of Catwoman of all people? You do know that she’s the bad guy, and Batman’s the good guy right? And they’re kinda enemies.”
“Exactly. They’re like us.” James’ smile didn’t falter, nor did he hesitate in his answer. “Sure, they butt heads, but one way or another they always come together in some love interest-ish anyway.”
Abigail eyed him for a moment, trying both to discern if any of what he said was true, and whether or not she should consciously read more into his chosen analogy for their relationship. She wasn’t going to.
“Plus, they make a hot couple.” James winked at her, and her musings were broken. She rolled her eyes at him before giving into a smile that he returned.
And as she hooked her arms around his stomach, an odd feeling came over her. Well, maybe more of a revelation of sorts. She felt safe… and calm - especially with his strong build flush against the face of her torso.
Over the past few months, his mere presence had begun to give her that much and it was both a relief and a fright.
“You’re a dork, by the way.” She grinned, pushing away the nerve-inducing thoughts.
James pulled away from the curb and replied with a grin of his own, “Yeah, well this dork wants pizza.”
“As long as you’re paying!”
/*/*/*/
Abigail had gone into her bedroom to change, while James set about getting plates and place mats for the pizza. It was a normal Friday night, just another date night. Well, except for the motorcycle ride. That was different. And fun. Definitely fun. He’d never forget Abigail’s wide-eyed, ecstatic face after they parked in the apartment garage, and how she had squealed when they sped in between two SUVs.
Five minutes past, and James was brought out of his reverie when Abigail walked out of her bedroom, clad simply in jeans and a gray t-shirt with her hair pulled into a loose bun.
“Hey there, sexy,” James said by way of greeted. His girlfriend replied with an eye roll as she reached the table.
“Only you would think this -” she motioned to her attire “- is sexy.”
James responded with a grin and said, “Actually, your shirt’s pretty tight. And so are your pants. So it is kinda sexy.”
Abigail laughed. “You don’t look too bad yourself,” she said with a wink. Then she added dryly, “with that scruff on your face.” She diverted her path away from him, and moved toward the plates he was still holding in his hands.
“Hey,” James replied, stepping into her space as she set the second plate down at his place on the table. “You know you love it. Just admit it.” He leaned in and closed the remaining space between them, kissing the corner of her lips, making sure that his “scruff” met much of her skin.
When James pulled away, Abigail’s eyes went dark and sultry as his grin turned entirely devilish. “And… if I do?” She arched an eyebrow, just daring the man to react the way she knew he wanted to.
“Well,” he murmured, his voice low and rough. “We could always...”
James leaned down as she moved up onto the balls of her bare feet, wrapping her arms around his neck and allowing her lips to meet chastely with his. As was the first time, this was sweet and soft – but quick.
All too quick.
So, he grabbed Abigail by the waist and pulled her back into him – passionate, unrelenting and full of desire. Their feet tangled and they momentarily stumbled, but he tightened his hold on her torso and caught them both against the dining table. The whole act elicited a moan both of pleasure and surprise from…whom? Neither was sure exactly; they simply smiled into the fiery kiss until the need for air made pulling away absolutely imperative.
Abigail rested her forehead against James’ as they took a chance to breathe, both their faces aglow. She looked up into his eyes as did he, and she found something there that she couldn’t quite identify. But it was warm and good. It made her smile widen.
That smile hadn’t gone unnoticed. It made James’ chest swell with something he hadn’t bothered to name until now. Though, in retrospect, he had always known what this feeling was from the moment it had first come around.
“I love you.”
Eight letters, three words, one meaning.
They had tumbled out of James’ mouth in a low but confident whisper before he could even think about the repercussions.
Abigail’s eyes immediately widened in shock and slight apprehension. She lifted her head away from his, barely a few centimeters away, but it was still a distance.
“I… James, no.”
She moved to exit his embrace, but his grip around her torso only stiffened.
“Hey wait, wait.”
When James had said those words to her, his gaze was soft and smile-urging. But now, it hurt too much for her to even look at him. Underneath the warm, affectionate expression on the man’s face laid a faint look of cold disappointment and uneasiness. Abigail wanted to fix this. She had to fix this.
“You never said that. We can forget it ever happened, just go back to having fun. It’s worked well enough so far. Come on, let’s just eat.”
This time, he let her move out of his arms. He schooled the expression on his face as she sat down in her usual seat, hoping he would do the same, but when she looked up, he was standing stock still in the spot where she had left him. James’ expression was stoic and unreadable. Abigail furrowed her eyebrows in a silent question, but one that she knew she didn’t want an answer to.
James sighed, and with it came all his emotions. They sat in his sad eyes of green: dejection, disconcertion, disappointment. His brows furrowed slightly as if attempting to fight the emotions back down, to where it would be less apparent for Abigail to see.
Then, with a stern, all too professional-sounding voice he said, “What if I don’t want to just ‘have fun’ anymore?”
“James–”
“No, Abby. We’ve been going at this for almost seven months now. How long do you expect this to just be ‘fun’?”
“James, we’ve already talked about this, I–”
“Yeah, we have talked about this, and you said that we could do it, that you wanted to do it. You said that you’d let me love you someday.”
Abigail released a shaky breath and broke the staring so that she could take a moment and regain some lost strength. When she looked back at him though, all the fight she had just gathered all but left her system.
Defeated, she whispered, “But what if today isn’t that day?”
Never before had she ever seen James Fischer ever look more somber than in this moment.
“Then, I guess… maybe it’ll be at least another week until we do this again.” His voice was surprisingly calm and collected, considered what he was implying.
“Do what again?” Abigail asked, too innocently clueless.
Not a moment later, however, she tore her gaze away from his, blinking rapidly to keep the stubborn tears at bay.
Mock ignorance could only go so far.
“This,” James answered her angrily, motioning between the both of them with a pointed finger. “It’s done – you and me; dating; seeing each other – It’s done. At least for now.” He grabbed his jacket that was hung over the back of the dining table chair, and turned in direction of the door.
“No, James please don’t go.”
Abigail internally winced at the words. Never had she thought that those words would ever leave her lips and be intended for a significant other. But here she was, meaning them more than she ever thought possible, her voice sounding unusually small and pleading.
When the man in question reached the door, he turned back to face her, his eyes now suddenly void of anger. Now, they held only a calm disappointment. He genuinely hoped that she would come around after this decision he was making for the both of them.
And after having taken a deep breath, he said, “I need you to be able to let me in. Or at least let me… keep you – love you. Maybe then; maybe from there… we’d have a place to start and go from.”
“James…”
What were going to be Abigail’s pleading words had died on her tongue as the door closed with a gentle click, putting yet more space between her and the man that could quite possibly hold her heart someday, if not already.
/*/*/*/
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i haven't read the first part of this book so sorry if i get anything wrong:)
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