Young Writers Society

Okay so I don't really expect a review on this, it's just for a laugh. It happened to me ealier and I couldn't resist posting this since I've never posted non-fiction before and I figured this was harmless. Yes everything that happened is 100% true with the exception of me changing names. I hope you get a laugh out of it I realize my use of description isn't very good but in my defense I was so flustered I don't remember half the crap that happened, so give me a break.

The guy walks into room. I turn away after saying hi. "That was rude, Hilary," says Allie.
"What, what did I do? I didn't mean to do anything."
The Guy comes over and asks for all our names and then sits right next to me. Why was a red light flashing? "Hi. I'm so and so." I honestly don't remember his name.
"I'm Hilary. I'm sorry. I was just trying to figure out if I knew you from somewhere."
"Yeah, I was just in your class." Why was he so close? "You know, I'm only coming here so I can find an Eternal companion." Tell me Allie heard that. Nope. Why was I laughing? I didn't know how to react to flirting!
"Well I'm not planning on getting married for another couple years."
"Aw, why not?"
"Because I want to go to college. I just graduated high school."
"Oh really?"
"Twenty-seven year plan," Allie whispers.
Must leave room. Yes, quickest escape route must be found. I get up and walk to the drinking fountain.
While I'm gone: "Don't worry," Allie says, "Hilary is just socially awkward and she's afraid of guys. We've all had the same friends for five years now so we're all kind of socially awkward."
When I come back he says it's nice meeting us all and then walks away.

*Later, while we're outside*

"Was it just me or was that guy flirting with me?" I asked.
"Oh, he was flirting with you. He must have chosen you because you were the one that gave him the weird look at the beginning of class." Hey, I think I'm pretty.
"Well I couldn't have screwed that up worse."
"Have you ever flirted with a guy before?"
"Jeff," I replied.
She shook her head. "You need some flirting lessons. It's a very important skill for college."
"Oh really?"
"Yep."

*Later, walking home with just me and Afton*

"I've decided I'm going to scare away the first four guys that take an interest in me, and then I'll know my true love when he comes back even after his first impression."
Afton laughed. "Yep."

Wow, that must have been pretty awkward for you! Sounds like something I would do if a guy was flirting with me...
I know you said you just posted this for a laugh, but with a bit more work - more description, fill in gaps between dialogue, etc. - it would certainly make an excellent story.
Thanks for sharing your hilarious experience

I know how you feel. I too need flirting lessons, but then again I just don't flirt, not with anyone. Nice little story, very brave of you to post something non-fiction here but never the less it was a fantastic little story.
There where some minor grammar mistakes, personally I'm very bad with grammar but there where some issues with it.
There are some great articles here on grammar, although yours is quite a lot better than mine.
I love your voice, its really open and honesty. I can defiantly see how this little scenario is true. Although sometimes the dialogue did get a little confusing.

Great work!

Thanks for your comments! I looked back at it and realized it was a little confusing and there was some grammar mistakes, but that's mostly because this started out as a journal entry (I write my journal entries very different from my regular writing) and it was just changed a little when I posted it on here. But I'm glad you guys could see the reality in it