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42 Reviews


Gender: Female
Points: 890
Reviews: 42
Mon Mar 20, 2006 7:35 pm
Jerikas says...



This has really good imagery but there are loads of spelling mistakes, the most obvious being 'feild' which should be 'field'.

Check for spelling mistakes before you post!

Other than that I like it, again your imagery is good and I would like to see if you can continue this because I don't see how it could be continued myself..
I used up all my sick days, so I'm calling in dead.

He's not dead, he's electroencephalographically challenged.
  





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685 Reviews


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Reviews: 685
Mon Mar 20, 2006 8:28 pm
Rei says...



Definitely has protential. However, I think it would be better to switch to past-tense.
Please, sit down before you fall down.
Belloq, "Raiders of the Lost Ark"
  








What really knocks me out is a book that, when you're all done reading it, you wish the author that wrote it was a terrific friend of yours and you could call him up on the phone whenever you felt like it. That doesn't happen much, though.
— J.D. Salinger, The Catcher in the Rye