Young Writers Society

Note: Mockingjay: Finnick/Katniss Friendship Fic. Spoilers.


“Finnick, I’m going to give you about two seconds to explain yourself before I kill you.”

He snickers at me, holding up his trident teasingly. “One –"

My glare would put Coin’s to shame. “Finnick –“

“Two.” His tongue clicks disapprovingly. “You’re an awful assassin, my dear.”

“Can you..please…just answer me, Finnick. I don’t have the patience for this. What are you doing, bugging the meeting hall?”

“Katniss, darling, you are so uptight. What happened to that fiery, obnoxious girl I met at the Capitol?”

When I don’t give him an answer, he sighs dramatically. “Fine. I was just looking for some clues, you know, as to when we might be getting out of this boring prison. I’ve decided you don’t need weapons and jabberjays to be tortured. All it requires is a cow of a president, stuffy old meetings, and fishless meals. And,” his expression gets sour, “useless rescue teams.”

A headache starts to creep into my head. I rub my temples, and refuse to look at Finnick. Everything in my head wants to pick itself up and fly away, like the mockingjay I am supposed to represent.

My name is Katniss Everdeen. I am seventeen years old. My home is District 12. I was in the Hunger Games. I escaped –

But someone didn’t. Someone is still there. Someone I care about. Someone who matters more than I ever will. Who will always be a far better person.

“Katniss.” Finnick touches my cheek gently. “Katniss, I care about him, too.”

I want to shake my head, except a lump comes up and settles into my throat. No, I want to say, no you don’t, but the words stick.

He puts the trident Beetee made for him aside, and puts out his arms. I don’t want to crawl into them; somehow, though, I end up stumbling into his chest, bumping my chin against his neck. A hand comes up to stroke my mistreated hair.

“It’s okay.” His murmur is kind. For a second, I know why Annie Cresta fell in love with him. I also know he understands what it’s like to lose someone you can’t live without.

When the sobs come, he doesn’t say another word.

Gah! I can't believe he died. It was so horrific. Screw Prim and Madge, I want Finnick back!! Great story, maybe a bit short. I don't like to give full reviews to fanfiction because it's not like you can have it published. Regardless, amazing job!



~Jas

I agree that it's short. I wanted it to be longer, but the last line just didn't let me continue. Will probably add some more after I sleep on it.

Thanks for the review!

--Glim

Hey I'm going to review your work

If the killer is going to kill Finnick anyway why does he need an explaination, why not just get it over with...are you hinting there is some doubt in the killer, because the words used does not make it obvious...this confuses me!

“Finnick, I’m going to give you about two seconds to explain yourself before I kill you.”

Never start a sentence with and!

And,” his expression gets sour, “useless rescue teams.”

Nice description...but im not sure that creeping into your head flows properly, it doesn't match to the language previously used, if it was conversational then it would work, but this seems formal, and you would use formailty when speaking to yourself!!

A headache starts to creep into my head.

A far better person than who? You?

Who will always be a far better person.

So what I don't get is how a killer decides to not kill, but runs into the arms of her supposed victim...is it because she is naive? If so..I think you need to show her inoccence a little more, and give us a little idea as to what she is like. Bring out that character a little more.
This is a really good idea, well done!

Hi!

Thanks for your review! I'll keep in mind what you had to say.

Since this is fanfiction, I'm not trying to give too many details about the character and situation. I'm assuming that a reader of Mockingjay will know enough about the storyline to understand the snapshot. Additional details, however, may be useful, as you said.

I will edit this!

--Glim

I haven't read Mockingjay, but I have read the first two. This is brilliant, I want to read more! You have a really good storyline and you really have a knack for keeping the reader interested! Well done!

Thank you! I'm glad you liked it.

--Glim

I just finished Mockingjay, and it seems to me that you've got everything down straight. Finnick and Katniss were just like they always are. I wasn't sure when and where in the book this was happening--or if it was just some random scene--but it was well written. Very nice.

Frankly not that much of a spoiler for Mockingjay (which ROCKS! just a btw). But I like how you captured Finnick but I think Katniss would have actually attacked him if he really was trying her patience. Anyways, I liked how Finnick was cocky yet showed a caring. I think you should move on from this and make it more. If you know what I mean, that makes one of us (just kidding....or am I?) and if you don't, ya that happens a lot. Anyways keep writing I see promise.