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Young Writers Society


Why I Wear The Color Black



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68 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 2619
Reviews: 68
Mon Dec 19, 2011 1:58 am
sarahjane97 says...



Why do I wear the color black?
It doesn't really matter.
Why don't we change the subject
and engage in mindless chatter?

Why do I wear the color black?
Well, why do you wear pink?
Black is just another color
regardless of what you think.

Why do I wear the color black?
Man, this is getting old.
Why don't you just stop asking
and accept what you are told?

Why do I wear the color black?
Well, if you need to know,
the real reason I wear black
is so the bruises will not show.
  





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23 Reviews



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Mon Dec 19, 2011 2:26 am
farz95 says...



Hey there!

I really liked your poem. I m also a very big fan of colour black so i guess that’s what made me like your poem even more.
My favourite part was the part where it says
Why do I wear the color black?
Man, this is getting old.
Why don't you just stop asking
and accept what you are told

Even the way you have ended the poem is very nice and interesting!
I couldn't find and spelling or grammatical error so well done !

Great job!
Farz :D
  





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Mon Dec 19, 2011 4:09 am
TylynRae says...



all I can say is wow... I really enjoyed this piece. It was short, and it wasn't like it was overly dramatic in the imagery or anything just out of this world that way. But it was just so... I don't even know how to explain it. You think at first that they're just going to go into how they like the color and what not, but then you hit us with that last line. I dont know why, but that last line just really hit me. So, congrats on leaving me without much to say. I usually try to give descent, somewhat lengthy reviews on things that could be improved, but the ending still has its hold on me. Truly a great piece in my opinion.
TylynTyrannosaurus<3 (tydecker777)
  





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Reviews: 139
Mon Dec 19, 2011 5:00 am
SwallowedByInsanity says...



Wow. I loved this truly, just the content and everything was fantastic. It reminded me of a girl I know and how she always says I should "go out and get a manicure" and "do something with my hair" and "wear girl's shoes".
Maybe that's not the type of thing you were getting at, but it's just what came to mind. Normally, I edit through the poem and look for awkward sections, incorrect grammar, spelling errors, and areas that need improvement but in all honesty, I found nothing to critique. (trust me, that hardly happens) you've earned not only a like from me (something truly rare) but a blurb of mindless ogling over your beautiful piece. For the sake of everyone less talented, keep writing!
Love is a poison, but it is also the antidote.

The insanity at my fingertips is not even slightly coherent.
  





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Tue Dec 20, 2011 2:41 am
Seraph says...



*Clicks like* *Wishes he could click LOVE*

Nicely done! ;)
"At this very instant, I augment the spacetime that permeates and weaves our beings."
  





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Tue Dec 20, 2011 3:52 am
Dreamwalker says...



I'm going to keep this short due to the fact that my criticism will come at a later time. This is going to sound probably a little rude, so I hope you don't mind.

But black is not a colour. It's a shade >_>.

That, of course, is debatable, but when I get back to this, I'll give a little explanation into what my reasoning's for noting that was. Unfortunately I am out of time tonight. Expect an explanation tomorrow (or when YWS is back up).
Suppose for a moment that the heart has two heads, that the heart has been chained and dunked in a glass booth filled with river water. The heart is monologuing about hesitation and fulfillment while behind the red brocade the heart is drowning. - R.S
  








Love is so short, forgetting is so long.
— Pablo Neruda