Young Writers Society

Hello Hello I know you might not see this but I wanted to give some older works a shot, Overall this is a very smooth piece with a few typos that are present not breaking it. In fact, I didn't notice the typos at first, don't worry others have brought it up so I won't beat an old dead horse.

I also like the harsh imagery and dark plot paired with a soft almost unbothered flow. Personally, I feel this could play into the overall theme and historical context of the poem. it reminds me of the lullaby version of a japanse song ( I cant remember the name of it right now. To me, I see this poem as dealing with the horrors of early imperialistic Japan and its heavy military force. As I am neither from the culture nor a historian I do not want to get too deep into this.

Wherever you are I hope you are doing well. If you ever see this I wish you luck, Keep writing and drink water!

Interpretations/Commentaries (Only of Stanza One):
Line One (stars whispered,) - According to All the Science, there are between 30 and 70 billion trillion stars in the universe. And Google's definitions of whispered is to "speak very softly using one's breath without one's vocal cords, especially for the sake of privacy" while in literary terms, it means "(of leaves, wind, or water) rustle or murmur softly." Hence, if all of those stars murmured softly, then it might be similar to if there were an unfathomable amount of voices inside your head nagging you like words you know but don't remember yet it's at the tip of your tongue. Regardless, this personification gives me an enthralling image in my mind, sending chills throughout my body because being in that scenario in first person would be equally an incredible experience with being awestruck and amazed as well as it would be a scary situation because you don't know what is happening or why it is happening.
Line Two (gates closed.) - Regardless if this happened during the night or day, the gates closing would just add the tension and spark panic perhaps if you were the type of person to panic under the circumstances that are occurring.
Line Three (fear mounted) - Although mounted means "riding an animal, typically a horse, especially for military or other duty," I'm sure you meant increased in some way or another. And that would be an accurate adjective of what someone would feel when the personification of stars that aren't supposed to be alive begin to murmur softly at you and then the gates close.
Line Four (as red sun rose) - Now I'm pretty certain this wasn't an allusion to How the Read Sun Rose; regarding The Origin and Development of the Yan'an Rectification Movement throughout 1930 to 1945. But that is what came up on Google when I looked this line up. Otherwise, this line seems bittersweet. It's easily imaginable. Succinct yet in-depth.

Review:
I love this two stanza poem because, even though it isn't complete, it's digestible and has an aesthetic manner that might be overly used but it's nice nonetheless. Well done, beautifully written, and kudos to this being the third written work published on here.

- Lil, aka HalfheartedAmateur

You are off to a great start. Your rhyming was great along with your use of punctuation. Everything flowed perfectly, and I can't wait to read the next part. Great job!

Bumping this up.

Hello, Keep here for a quick review! So, I know this was written in 2004, and I was only a child then but, I've made up a "review really old works project" so forgive me. XD Anyway, Kay, I really liked this, and I'd love to see the rest to this poem! I find it kind of sad that this was spammed with 100+ reviews from one person and I wish this had gotten the attention it deserves. The only two faults I found in it was that it's not capitalized anywhere (which you don't have to do) and you're missing an "a" after "as" in the fourth stanza.

Other than that this deserves a like.

~Keep <3

Sooo... this poem was written a long long time ago, but I still liked it. Dunno why I'm writing this, the author will probably never see it. Didn't know they had the internet back when this was published. Yeah, that's my attempt at a joke. I'm here all night. ANYWAYS...

I do not really know if the punctuation was necessary in this poem.

I wouldn't have said "as red sun rose"

Overall, I liked it. Pretty hard to decently critic a poem
that's eight lines long. It rhymed. It wasn't overdone.

Good job.

And still not finished yet.

Hello!

Emilykay10144 here...

So I decided to read and review a piece that was like ten years ago, because you know I have no life haha.

I really like short poems that have the same feeling throughout the whole poem, and your poem is exactly that. I'm seriously going to read more of your writings. You are really talented and this poem was ten years ago. I just can imagine how much more talented you are now!

-Emilykay10144

Why Threnody copy and pasted his or her comment multiple times I will never know, but anyway. Good piece of work. Although unfinished it is still quite good. Sorry for the short review but I'm in school at the moment.

-WartyFingleBlaster

(~:

This is good, I like the rhyme sequence, very catchy. Renewing this with more stanzas would be awesome.

While there's no rules against putting the beginnings of your lines in lowercase I advise that you don't, or at least for the line after the period. You have periods and commas at the end of each of your lines, so capital letters would make sense too.

But I like this poem; it's original, it's catchy P), and it sucks you in. Good Job! (y)

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

Hey lady, thought I'd take you up on your offer for a character sketch! For one, I thought this was a really good piece and I have next to nothing to critique you on. However, next to nothing is semi-substantial, so here are the few comments I do have,

For one, I really love the quotes you use. They really help pace your piece and aid in your revelations. However, I believe that you are being almost careless in your casual throwing around of names. Some people do not recognise some of the names of the people you quote and therefore admire the quote, but take nothing from the quoted. Personally, being accustomed to Robert Ebert's sharp wit I appreciated the reference. However, for the sake of clarification, and for the sake of readers taking the most out of your writing, adding in a short statement about who these people are would make your interpretations more valid and enriching. Additionally, when you make direct quotes, I think you should put them in quotations. This not only shows respect for the people whose words you use, but helps to differentiate their words from yours.

Aside from this, I thought your piece was clean, very well conveyed, and all together quite a shining star. The message was very relevant and clearly stated and I enjoyed the read.

Threnody

I really loved this script! You successfully freaked me out with Malisa's dialogue and I became really interested with the story. I just have a few comments.

1. I think one of the reasons why your classmates were confused about this was because Malisa and Alia's relationship was not clearly defined in the dialogue. The readers and the listeners are never really sure exactly what kind of character Alia is, what her story is, why she's so dedicated to visiting Malisa...etc. Alia has been set up as one of the key characters, the one who supposedly helps us understand the action, and she does not reveal much of anything to expand and elaborate upon the other dialogue. Her dialogue is usually pretty stiff and uniform and does not allow us to view her as a unique character.

In fact, I think the only character who really had an outstanding personality was Malisa, the crazy one, which means that every other piece of dialogue was simply supplementary to hers. This is never good as it does not round out the script and sort of focuses the interest on one character who simply cannot bear that weight. My suggestion is to broaden all of the character's personalities through their dialogue and through the blocking notes. This will clarify and intensify the plot and give your script a deeper and more fascinating scope.

2. I also feel like another source of confusion could be that the end was very abrupt. You used many different references to Greek Mythology, but never followed through on how they related to your script. Also, Greek Mythology + Aliens = weird and confusing. I think you were trying to fit too many dimensions of this situation into too short a play or your play was simply not long enough to accommodate everything you wanted to bring up. It's difficult for a reader to enjoy a play that is this vague and up to interpretation. It would be helpful to include in the dialogue more information about what is going on. It's important to keep in mind how readers or viewers are going to interpret your play.

In all, I think the idea was really interesting but I wanted more in the way of detail, characterisation and execution. It really captured my attention and it was extremely well paced and entertaining.

Threnody

I really loved this script! You successfully freaked me out with Malisa's dialogue and I became really interested with the story. I just have a few comments.

1. I think one of the reasons why your classmates were confused about this was because Malisa and Alia's relationship was not clearly defined in the dialogue. The readers and the listeners are never really sure exactly what kind of character Alia is, what her story is, why she's so dedicated to visiting Malisa...etc. Alia has been set up as one of the key characters, the one who supposedly helps us understand the action, and she does not reveal much of anything to expand and elaborate upon the other dialogue. Her dialogue is usually pretty stiff and uniform and does not allow us to view her as a unique character.

In fact, I think the only character who really had an outstanding personality was Malisa, the crazy one, which means that every other piece of dialogue was simply supplementary to hers. This is never good as it does not round out the script and sort of focuses the interest on one character who simply cannot bear that weight. My suggestion is to broaden all of the character's personalities through their dialogue and through the blocking notes. This will clarify and intensify the plot and give your script a deeper and more fascinating scope.

2. I also feel like another source of confusion could be that the end was very abrupt. You used many different references to Greek Mythology, but never followed through on how they related to your script. Also, Greek Mythology + Aliens = weird and confusing. I think you were trying to fit too many dimensions of this situation into too short a play or your play was simply not long enough to accommodate everything you wanted to bring up. It's difficult for a reader to enjoy a play that is this vague and up to interpretation. It would be helpful to include in the dialogue more information about what is going on. It's important to keep in mind how readers or viewers are going to interpret your play.

In all, I think the idea was really interesting but I wanted more in the way of detail, characterisation and execution. It really captured my attention and it was extremely well paced and entertaining.

Threnody

LOVED IT!!!!!!!! it was very good! Keep it up!

Woops! I knew there was something wrong with it.. maybe I should have read it aloud then I would have noticed!

stars whispered,
gates closed.
fear mounted,
as red sun rose.

a new day dawned,
a battle won.
people mourned,
for what had begun.

families parted,
best friends gone.
tears have started,
is this not wrong?

Interesting...not the kind of rhyme scheme I would personally have chosen, but it works. I like the first two verses OK but in the third you changed the rhyme scheme from a b a b to a a b b. Just swap around the order of the lines a little so that it goes "families parted,/best friends gone,/tears have started./is this not wrong?" and it fits right though. Makes better sense too. Looking forward to seeing where you're going with this - I'll save my reviewing for the finished product

Okay, well, I've thought of the next verse so here's the updated version for you all.

stars whispered,
gates closed.
fear mounted,
as red sun rose.

a new day dawned,
a battle won.
people mourned,
for what had begun.

families parted,
tears have started.
best friends gone,
is this not wrong?

Hmmm... not too sure on the last line but I'll look at that later!

Thanks! Still thinking about what to put next...

*five thumbs up* Love it! It flows really well.

short--easy--but very meaningful.
*two thumbs up*

Yes, it is good, and does sound like a short history.

this is nice- very simple and clear, not overwritten or forced. reminds me a little of a haiku.

I figured it did look like a history of a story. Add more when you are finished, it may turn out really good, KayJuran!

I want to add a couple more verses but I've got to think about it more...
(it's meant to be the history of my story)

I'll post it again once I've got more!!!

I reall like it so far. Of course, it does end rather abruptly, but you are going to add more to it. The imagery involved needs a little more fleshing out, but what you got is great already. Brian is right, this story flows really well and it seems just to roll off your tongue.

Good thinking, Brian. That was really consistent and very thorough. Me want more!

Although I think you rushed it a bit. See if you can come up with a better version, you could do a tiny bit better that will make a lot of difference if you ever get that published.

Wow... I really like this. The flow is consistent, and your choice of words is exceptional. Only thing is, it's like a teaser! I read it, and wanted to keep on reading!

Great job!